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Do black men really want to be heads of households?  
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Post Posted: 2021-01-20 07:21:25  
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I don't think black women so much "gold dig" but they do have conservative views of black men should take care of everything but black men's socioeconomic condition seems to be at conflict with that view.

Is it conservative family values or gold digging?



 
Post Posted: 2021-01-20 07:31:07  
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black women are doing it for themselves and taking care of the kids. Black men need to get their shit together, despite all the extra obstacles they have to face and do the same.
 
Post Posted: 2021-01-20 08:24:20  
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Yes thats why I’m gonna be a single father.
 
Post Posted: 2021-01-20 08:25:31  
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2021-01-20 07:21:25

black women are doing it for themselves and taking care of the kids. Black men need to get their shit together, despite all the extra obstacles they have to face and do the same.

But even still, black women associate masculinity with provision so it's not something they want to do but more have to do considering the lack of motivation and resources of black men.

This may be the key to why they expect monetary help because it is in line with the male being the head.

So, when black men feel that black women don't respect them it is because the black women feel black men don't fulfil this role due to lack of motivation and lack of resources or lack or motivation because you lack resources.
 
Post Posted: 2021-01-20 09:09:39  
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2021-01-20 07:21:25

Men and women have it twisted. They like the idea of traditional gender roles....but they don’t want to carry out those roles themselves. Like a man will want a traditional woman who cooks, cleans, lets him make the decisions, be the head of the household, he will want a woman who is cooperative, not fussy, doesn’t ask questions...but he will also want half of the rent on the first. And want you to go half on all the bills as well. You can’t be head of the household going 50/50. You can’t want a traditional woman and you yourself are a modern man.

Women want a man who pays all the bills, but they still want to be able to do and say whatever they want. They will complain about having to cook, clean, and cater to a man. They don’t want to cooperate, they focus on careers and being a Boss B*tch. But they don’t want their man to ask for help with bills. You can’t want a traditional man and you are a modern woman. There can’t be two bosses in a traditional household.

I was in a “50/50” relationship and it will never happen again. I was with a modern man who wanted a traditional woman. I do consider myself to be traditionally feminine. And I do believe in gender roles in MY household. It was hard...like you want me to cook, clean, cooperate, but I’m working full time and going half on bills like a roommate....and you want to be “head of household?” Absolutely not. And on top of that you not even making me feel appreciated as your gf? I’m not feeling appreciated and he’s feeling emasculated. I feel like that an issue a lot of black women are facing. We end up doing MORE work in our households if we are traditional women with a modern man and it’s simply NOT FAIR. Then when you want a man to pay all the bills you’re a leech or a gold digger, or you tryna use him for something.

My current bf and I have had this convo. He’s a natural provider and I’m a natural care taker. We decided should we ever get engaged and move in he will take care of the big things, I will take care of the little things. I can deal with that. I feel like we are both very traditional in our roles with a little dash of modernness...and that works when 2 ppl are on the same page. You have to know what you bring to the table and what you have to offer before making demands and setting expectations.

GAWD! This post encapsulates everything! It's a huge conflict of expectations. Its like everyone is trying to do just enough to get what they want out of the other person.
 
Post Posted: 2021-01-20 10:19:00  
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I was riding in my7 SUV and this song came on...it reminded of your topic. The song was called LOOKING FOR A REAL MAN by Rue Davis. Part of the lyrics went like this. People wonder why I can't find a man...all men lie and cheat...I need a man who will seven days a week and pay all the bills. My thought were SHE IS CRAZY AS HELL. What fool works seven days a week and pay all the bills? If you find once rub his head and keep him because he truly is a fool. What will she be doing seven day a week???????



 
Post Posted: 2021-01-20 11:12:27  
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2021-01-20 07:21:25

I was riding in my7 SUV and this song came on...it reminded of your topic. The song was called LOOKING FOR A REAL MAN by Rue Davis. Part of the lyrics went like this. People wonder why I can't find a man...all men lie and cheat...I need a man who will seven days a week and pay all the bills. My thought were SHE IS CRAZY AS HELL. What fool works seven days a week and pay all the bills? If you find once rub his head and keep him because he truly is a fool. What will she be doing seven day a week???????

2021-01-20 11:10:48

For some women even that is not enough. After him working 70 hrs+ a week she will want him to come home and be emotionally available sit up and talk about feelings all night, and the future, and will want to be doted on and adored.

And all the man wants is to pop open a beer, watch tv, sit back and get his dick sucked. When you have a man that’s paying ALL of the bills there are things you can’t expect from a man...and some women don’t understand that.

You summed that up nicely...ln thank you very much!!!
 
Post Posted: 2021-01-20 11:53:19  
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Head of household isn’t relevant anymore it’s just something for tax purposes to give credit to the one who makes the most money.

Yes a man should be the king of his castle but the women will never be satisfied completely in all areas.

The best they can do is give him a sense that he is in control and keep him happy where he won’t mind paying those bills.

Tony is a head of household type man because that is how his father was they don’t like their women to work outside the home unless it’s something very traditionally feminine and part time. When he calls you or needs you you better be able to leave and not care about going back.

He even created a job for me once, lol.
 
Post Posted: 2021-01-20 14:16:39  
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2021-01-20 07:21:25

I was riding in my7 SUV and this song came on...it reminded of your topic. The song was called LOOKING FOR A REAL MAN by Rue Davis. Part of the lyrics went like this. People wonder why I can't find a man...all men lie and cheat...I need a man who will seven days a week and pay all the bills. My thought were SHE IS CRAZY AS HELL. What fool works seven days a week and pay all the bills? If you find once rub his head and keep him because he truly is a fool. What will she be doing seven day a week???????

2021-01-20 11:10:48

For some women even that is not enough. After him working 70 hrs+ a week she will want him to come home and be emotionally available sit up and talk about feelings all night, and the future, and will want to be doted on and adored.

And all the man wants is to pop open a beer, watch tv, sit back and get his dick sucked. When you have a man that’s paying ALL of the bills there are things you can’t expect from a man...and some women don’t understand that.

And they are BLACK men.

Even though men make more than women, I'm pretty sure most black men are locked out of the economy and/or can't work legal jobs due to felony convictions. A lot them do illegal things to provide the materialistic lifestyle and image that black women want.

These men also seem often afraid to express discontent because they would be expressing discontent with being a man, in essence. Can't never do that lol
 
Post Posted: 2021-01-20 14:26:35  
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2021-01-20 07:21:25

I don't think black women so much "gold dig" but they do have conservative views of black men should take care of everything but black men's socioeconomic condition seems to be at conflict with that view.

Is it conservative family values or gold digging?

They don't want to be married, provide, help build, but with no wealth how can you provide?
 
Post Posted: 2021-01-20 14:34:54  
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I'm a traditional Irish house wife. I cook, clean, make coffee, tea, pastries, and that's all I'm doing.



 
Post Posted: 2021-01-20 14:42:18  
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Y’all love to bash nikkas, thinkin you some surrogate females or some shit. Check between your legs and see the dick swinging
 
Post Posted: 2021-01-20 14:50:50  
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2021-01-20 07:21:25

Men and women have it twisted. They like the idea of traditional gender roles....but they don’t want to carry out those roles themselves. Like a man will want a traditional woman who cooks, cleans, lets him make the decisions, be the head of the household, he will want a woman who is cooperative, not fussy, doesn’t ask questions...but he will also want half of the rent on the first. And want you to go half on all the bills as well. You can’t be head of the household going 50/50. You can’t want a traditional woman and you yourself are a modern man.

Women want a man who pays all the bills, but they still want to be able to do and say whatever they want. They will complain about having to cook, clean, and cater to a man. They don’t want to cooperate, they focus on careers and being a Boss B*tch. But they don’t want their man to ask for help with bills. You can’t want a traditional man and you are a modern woman. There can’t be two bosses in a traditional household.

I was in a “50/50” relationship and it will never happen again. I was with a modern man who wanted a traditional woman. I do consider myself to be traditionally feminine. And I do believe in gender roles in MY household. It was hard...like you want me to cook, clean, cooperate, but I’m working full time and going half on bills like a roommate....and you want to be “head of household?” Absolutely not. And on top of that you not even making me feel appreciated as your gf? I’m not feeling appreciated and he’s feeling emasculated. I feel like that an issue a lot of black women are facing. We end up doing MORE work in our households if we are traditional women with a modern man and it’s simply NOT FAIR. Then when you want a man to pay all the bills you’re a leech or a gold digger, or you tryna use him for something.

My current bf and I have had this convo. He’s a natural provider and I’m a natural care taker. We decided should we ever get engaged and move in he will take care of the big things, I will take care of the little things. I can deal with that. I feel like we are both very traditional in our roles with a little dash of modernness...and that works when 2 ppl are on the same page. You have to know what you bring to the table and what you have to offer before making demands and setting expectations.

Totally agree with you! Both have to either be traditional or modern not one traditional and one modern. Everyone just wants to have the benefits and not put in the work
 
Post Posted: 2021-01-20 15:17:25  
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2021-01-20 07:21:25

Y’all love to bash nikkas, thinkin you some surrogate females or some shit. Check between your legs and see the dick swinging

You sound hurt.
 
Post Posted: 2021-01-20 15:48:38  
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2021-01-20 07:21:25

I don't think black women so much "gold dig" but they do have conservative views of black men should take care of everything but black men's socioeconomic condition seems to be at conflict with that view.

Is it conservative family values or gold digging?

To look at the Black man in these United States is to also acknowledge the deep and abiding hatred visited on us.

There has been a concerted effort to disenfranchise and, yes, marginalize Black men at almost every strata of society. From the delivery of education, healthcare, interactions with law, finance, housing, and employment, the deck has always been stacked in favor of whites.

Black women are allowed, yes allowed, to advance forward in order to further marginalize Black men and open a larger pool of available women to the apex race and its proxies.

Black women, being more focused on the material would of course be open to submitting to white men and are lately more attracted to them.

So, of course, it is easy to blame the Black man for his present circumstances when looking at the situation within a compressed perspective, devoid of any background or history.
 
Post Posted: 2021-01-20 15:55:03  
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2021-01-20 07:21:25

Y’all love to bash nikkas, thinkin you some surrogate females or some shit. Check between your legs and see the dick swinging

2021-01-20 15:17:25

You sound hurt.

No, I just don’t fall prey to talking points rooted in a white supremacist disposition. I think critically and know the actions of a few aren’t indicative of the collective. Sweeping generalizations be damned
 
Post Posted: 2021-01-20 16:33:59  
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2021-01-20 07:21:25

I don't think black women so much "gold dig" but they do have conservative views of black men should take care of everything but black men's socioeconomic condition seems to be at conflict with that view.

Is it conservative family values or gold digging?

"Maybe" the title of this blog should be are "some" women asking bad boys to do nice guy things, such as 'not" minding handling the responsibility being the head of a household.

As a black man from here in Louisiana, I must say that I could have wrote more than this, but I stopped here, until I see what chall think of this comment first.
 
Post Posted: 2021-01-20 16:59:02  
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2021-01-20 07:21:25

Y’all love to bash nikkas, thinkin you some surrogate females or some shit. Check between your legs and see the dick swinging

2021-01-20 16:13:36

How do you think black men were bashed in these comments?

I wasn’t referring to you, you’re one of my favorite posters. I feel like you’re the only one who can spew the feminist talking points since you’re a woman. But a lot of the dudes on this board like to bash black dudes out of nowhere
 
Post Posted: 2021-01-20 17:16:27  
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2021-01-20 07:21:25

I don't think black women so much "gold dig" but they do have conservative views of black men should take care of everything but black men's socioeconomic condition seems to be at conflict with that view.

Is it conservative family values or gold digging?

2021-01-20 15:48:38

To look at the Black man in these United States is to also acknowledge the deep and abiding hatred visited on us.

There has been a concerted effort to disenfranchise and, yes, marginalize Black men at almost every strata of society. From the delivery of education, healthcare, interactions with law, finance, housing, and employment, the deck has always been stacked in favor of whites.

Black women are allowed, yes allowed, to advance forward in order to further marginalize Black men and open a larger pool of available women to the apex race and its proxies.

Black women, being more focused on the material would of course be open to submitting to white men and are lately more attracted to them.

So, of course, it is easy to blame the Black man for his present circumstances when looking at the situation within a compressed perspective, devoid of any background or history.

I know my history to know that it wasn't just black men [masc presenting is the assumed context]. But even with all that, black women s marry and are loyal to black men at higher rates so I don't know how they can be used as a proxy for white supremacy.

Even with their "advancements", they are still paid less than you and white man and a white women, yet, they still want to be lead by black men. This is why the demand is so high for masculinity. It is oft forgotten that black women have internalize the same black masculinity supremacy and preserving black male culture that black men have.

Black women have never lost loyalty to their men. I don't see why black men sometimes use black women and black gays as proxies for white supremacy when they are the number one supporters of black male domination. Every man in the gay black community wants masculinity and every black woman wants it to a fault. I don't see how, on God's green earth, any masculine black man can feel marginalize in a community when all he needs to do is exist and he is 50-70% venerated, add provision and he is more valuable. But even then, black women still do not abandon these low value men.

You must be thinking of yourself relative to a white man to feel disenfranchised by your own people.

Its an odd logic that I find in a lot of black men. Its like we are all black but have different experiences of each other.

Black women hold certain kinds of black men in a very high regard from birth to death.
 
Post Posted: 2021-01-20 17:24:23  
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2021-01-20 07:21:25

Y’all love to bash nikkas, thinkin you some surrogate females or some shit. Check between your legs and see the dick swinging

2021-01-20 15:17:25

You sound hurt.

2021-01-20 15:55:03

No, I just don’t fall prey to talking points rooted in a white supremacist disposition. I think critically and know the actions of a few aren’t indicative of the collective. Sweeping generalizations be damned

You need to look at black culture more panoramic.

A lot of black men think of yourselves relative to the status of white men so you never feel secure with yourself.

In the black community, expectations of traditional masculine roles are rigorous. Black men are expected to lead in all situations. Since they seem to fail to do this, and blacks are generally ignorant of the reasons why, it makes black men feel disrespected. But the demand is still high for you to lead and be superior.

Technically, I am a "woman" since I am feminine and antithetical to black male superiority. This is why black feminine homosexuals are used as proxies for white supremacy.

So, anyway, if you are expected to provide then how can a black woman be a gold digger? The whole point is to be examining and critical of how these dynamics cause division, conflict, misinterpretation, and misrepresentation of each other by each other.

You seemed to have missed the point, entirely.
 
Post Posted: 2021-01-20 17:31:58  
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2021-01-20 07:21:25

I don't think black women so much "gold dig" but they do have conservative views of black men should take care of everything but black men's socioeconomic condition seems to be at conflict with that view.

Is it conservative family values or gold digging?

I don't think you value or care for a black man. I would be shocked if you ever date one.
 
Post Posted: 2021-01-20 17:37:31  
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I’m always the head of my house hold ... I own everything the house the cars snd the land they sit on .
 
Post Posted: 2021-01-20 17:43:50  
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2021-01-20 07:21:25

I don't think black women so much "gold dig" but they do have conservative views of black men should take care of everything but black men's socioeconomic condition seems to be at conflict with that view.

Is it conservative family values or gold digging?

2021-01-20 17:31:58

I don't think you value or care for a black man. I would be shocked if you ever date one.

You're too sensitive and don't like strength.

I am probably the ONLY poster who has made thought provoking post about the overall condition of black men across the spectrum.

I am trying to save yall examining why do black women think black have to pay for everything when black men typically have limited resources.

IDK how you get dislike from my post.
 
Post Posted: 2021-01-20 17:48:45  
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2021-01-20 07:21:25

I don't think black women so much "gold dig" but they do have conservative views of black men should take care of everything but black men's socioeconomic condition seems to be at conflict with that view.

Is it conservative family values or gold digging?

2021-01-20 17:31:58

I don't think you value or care for a black man. I would be shocked if you ever date one.

2021-01-20 17:43:50

You're too sensitive and don't like strength.

I am probably the ONLY poster who has made thought provoking post about the overall condition of black men across the spectrum.

I am trying to save yall examining why do black women think black have to pay for everything when black men typically have limited resources.

IDK how you get dislike from my post.

Not sensitive, you never reply to what I say anyway. I post positive things to uplift our people. Try that sometimes.
 
Post Posted: 2021-01-20 17:51:48  
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2021-01-20 07:21:25

I don't think black women so much "gold dig" but they do have conservative views of black men should take care of everything but black men's socioeconomic condition seems to be at conflict with that view.

Is it conservative family values or gold digging?

2021-01-20 17:31:58

I don't think you value or care for a black man. I would be shocked if you ever date one.

2021-01-20 17:43:50

You're too sensitive and don't like strength.

I am probably the ONLY poster who has made thought provoking post about the overall condition of black men across the spectrum.

I am trying to save yall examining why do black women think black have to pay for everything when black men typically have limited resources.

IDK how you get dislike from my post.

2021-01-20 17:48:45

Not sensitive, you never reply to what I say anyway. I post positive things to uplift our people. Try that sometimes.

oh ok.
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