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Post Posted: 2018-03-13 16:37:08  
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Alright, so here’s the thing. I’ve been talking to this for about 3 months now. It’s long distance (about 800 miles 2 hr flight) and there’s a 24 year age gap. There isn’t a sugar daddy thing, or anything like that. I’ve never taken money from him or asked him to buy me things and don’t plan on doing it. We’ve had a few head butts here and there but nothing too serious. I did distance myself from him for about 3 weeks after a small fight we had about him being somewhat of a high-maintenance diva at times and coldhearted, but we’ve recently made up and things have been fine ever since. This past weekend I called him out on something. Basically, every chance he gets he turns a conversation sexual. He’s always complimenting my body, how I look, my ass etc. I know I look good, but I’m not shallow. I don’t get open off complements. I rather him said other things about my personality, how he loves talking to me, how I make him feel, etc. Anyway, after I said something about it he apologized and said he would stop it. I apologized for being oversensitive cause I know I’m no Virgin Mary, but it had me thinking. Basically this is what happened (Actual texts):

Note: The **’s aren’t what was said, just what I picked up from the what he told me.

Me: I guess I was just feeling some type of way cause I still don’t know how you feel about me.

Him: No worries, just know you’re a very sexy man. ** Translation: You make my dick hard, but that’s about it. OR I feel strongly about you and don\\\'t want to scare you away**

Me: That’s it? What do you feel towards me other than that?

(No replies yet)

I doubled texts like a bitch, but whatever: I don’t want to assume or jump to conclusions so could you tell me please? Once again, trying to get clarity on the situation

Him: Sorry for the late response, I was on the phone. I think you’re an amazing guy, very thoughtful, compassionate, a lot of curiosities and interest. Translation: You have good qualities, or I’ve probably told 100s of guys this.

Me: How do I make you feel? Do you see this going anywhere, do you want to be with me or you don’t know? You won’t hurt my feelings.

Him: I know the gay life is something new for you which can be scary which is totally understandable. You want to be loved and respected. And you want honesty. Translation: Once again, I’m going to supercoat it and dance around the question OR I know how you feel, I\\\'ve been there before.

Him: Where is this coming from?

Me: I just like having clarity. I don’t mean to come off as I’m pressuring you. We’ve been talking a while and time and energy is being invested

Him: You make me feel good, excited, nervous, angry, and frustrated. You make me thinking about what I’m saying or not saying.

Him: I enjoy talking to you and seeing your face.

Him: I enjoy talking about the future and really think and believe there could be a future.

Him: You make me feel young , but remind me that I’m older, and I have more life experience.

Him: I’m excited about getting to know you more, but afraid of getting closer. Translation: Either I’ve been hurt in the past or I’m giving you an excuse for wasting your time

Me: Why?

Him: I’m afraid of losing you to the military, or the gay life style. **Translation: You’re attractive and I know you have access to better guys than me or I\\\'m giving you an excuse, or I'm geuinely afraid**

Me: I don’t care about the gay lifestyle, and have no interest in it. It’s vain, superficial and full of promiscuous men looking for their next fix. Basically, I’m asking you this because…I want you to be my boyfriend.** Me being completely honest about how I feel, I’m a one man’s man. Once we’re together, it’s just us.**

Him: You’re sweet, but we should work on seeing each other a little more and getting to know each other better. I’m not going anywhere. Translation: I want to have my cake and eat it, too. I want to continue meeting up with you, accessing your body, hanging out with no strings. If something better comes along or I get bored, I can break away with a clear conscious. Or I wanna take things slow and get to know you better.

Me: Thank you for being honest.

Him: No problem. Are you OK?

Me: Yes.

Him: Ok, sleep well. Talk tomorrow.

Now I was feeling stupid all Monday, so I texted him and basically told him I wouldn’t be coming to visit him for my birthday next month. He was upset and outraged and cursed me out and said he knew I was gonna disappear and run from him, etc. He said guys are always coming to his life and leaving. After that he asked if I was ok and apologized and said he does care about me, etc. After I calmed down, I told him i’m still coming and that hopefully we can move on from this. We’ve been doing ok. Here’s my question

Bros, am I being played? I’m afraid I’m being strung along. I feel like I’m just this boy-toy that he wants to meet up with every so often, roll around in the sack, get his rocks off and find me again when he wants another round. He can talk so vividly about sex, what he wants to do to my body, but when I bring up the subject of us I get vague answers or just “Let’s see what happens”. I also don’t feel that way cause we talk daily, he’s always talking about future plans that involve us and is constantly reminding me of my passport cause he wants to take trips abroad with me. I can’t shake this feeling that he doesn’t like me in that same way I do or that I’m just a placeholder until another cute piece of ass comes along. He\\\'s older and we know how the gay community treats guys in their 50s. Does he not take me seriously cause of my age, or is he so jaded from being older and can't make meaningful connections anymore? I do have a habit of overreacting and jumping to conclusions, but I think because emotions are involved I can’t see straight. Can someone please give me some non-biased, non-BS non-PC advice? I need help. I’m man enough to admit I do like him and whenever I think about him my heart races, but also strong enough to walk away if the feeling isnt mutual. I’m not looking to get married or go get matching neck tattoos, but I would at least like to know if this is going somewhere and not wasting my time. Those weekend flights and airport parking ain’t cheap.

Tl;dr Am I Being played?

Grammar might be shitty, i typed this is a flurry.




 
Post Posted: 2018-03-13 16:42:36  
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Post Posted: 2018-03-13 17:13:53  
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Only you know if you're being played or not, but he should be help paying for those flights. If he can't make him come see you too. If he says no dump him.
 
Post Posted: 2018-03-13 17:14:28  
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Very interesting. You got all pissy and childish with me about a misunderstanding, but you put my ass on block!

If you're down for "listening" to me, I'll start off by saying that you ARE extremely attractive physically.

Your work ethic and moral compass seems to far exceed expectations of the average Negro Male well over age 50, so in a manner of speaking, you're a bit too mature ( in some ways ) than most.

I'll assume that this old niggah you've allowed yourself to get SPRUNG on is at least a fairly attractive looking old niggah!

The only person being playing is YOU playing yourself. That isn't to throw shade your way. This is constructive criticism that you NEED by old niggahz who can school you the right way.


This old niggah you messin' with is insecure about what it is that both of you supposedly have with one another. He's already let you know that as far as getting serious with you for some long haul shit, you're not the one and it aint TOTALLY on YOU.

He's OLD. You have MANY years ahead of you before YOU get OLD and have very limited resources for a good lover...especially if you don't ever develop into a good lover ( sexually and NONE Sexually ).

I don't know whether or not you've ever been molested at some point in your short life where you get all pissy about somebody you don't know paying you a compliment that often goes very sexual. You may NOT have been around very many Black and Latino men to know that we often do this and it doesn't always mean that we're trying to get up in them draws!

Unlike me, the average male lies 65% of the time about his sexual desires and extra curricular activities! So when I tell you something sexual, there's only about a 5% chance of SOME untruth I, personally speaking will say!

Getting back to your old nigger long distance lover: He's an old niggah who's keeping his limits options open mostly because much like ME, he's already seen something in your personality that dictates that you're FAR from ready to be in a relationship with an old niggah!

From everything that I've learned about you in the very brief amount of time you and I personally communicated, you have a whole lot of your shit together. The experience in dealing with people on some levels and how you process and deal with matters most likely is the main issue scaring the old man off!

He just may be one of the millions of nigger men who can't verbally communicate effectively and maturely... but wanna have bitch festivals and pity parties with other dumb faggy niggahz and never take ownership of their shit.

I can tell how you've dealt with ME personally via TEXT messaging/SnapChat/BGC Live private messaging that YOU haven't learned more mature ways in dealing with other dudes when there's a little rift or miscommunication.

Given the selection of people who scour and participate on social media...especially this site, I can pretty much see how you'd be how you are. I'm not saying that you're such this God Awful person neither. You certainly are NOT a horrible human being. That spot is reserved for the likes of bird-fu. lovepeacesoul1 and lose-ya-breath!

But ANYWAYS....

To keep putting shit blunt to you, you need to cut your loses with gramps and keep it moving on to someone who can emotionally and physically meet the demands and or needs you have. And stop getting pissy about someone with a healthy and strong sexual appetite letting your know that you look good enough eat up. Men DO that.

When the shit gets too uncomfortable for you to bare hearing, tell his ass to back up from the compliments. If they don't stop, then YOU stop fuckin' with him. Again, you're sexy as fuckin hell and dudes are going to wanna compliment you based upon their own amazement that you even give them the time of day!

No need to be a bitch about it.

To sum this all up, based on what you've stated, YOU'RE not the one for him and YOU need to get over it! He's actually doing YOU a favor by trying to treat you like a fuck toy. Accept that title from him and move on to another land where there IS no such title in existence.
 
Post Posted: 2018-03-13 17:19:28  
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2018-03-13 16:37:08

It's actually very good reading and falls within the scope of reaching out and helping these young brothas navigate through all of the fuckery in today's times!

He's actually a very good brotha, but just a bit young and inexperienced. He needs proper guidance from us old niggahz!

The generations of "men" in the Black community has been getting shittier and shittier with every group reaching the age of consent! Very UnCute!

Cop the brotha some slack. He's actually a good dude. Again, he's just young and inexperienced !
 
Post Posted: 2018-03-13 18:16:32  
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2018-03-13 16:37:08

Very interesting. You got all pissy and childish with me about a misunderstanding, but you put my ass on block!

If you're down for "listening" to me, I'll start off by saying that you ARE extremely attractive physically.

Your work ethic and moral compass seems to far exceed expectations of the average Negro Male well over age 50, so in a manner of speaking, you're a bit too mature ( in some ways ) than most.

I'll assume that this old niggah you've allowed yourself to get SPRUNG on is at least a fairly attractive looking old niggah!

The only person being playing is YOU playing yourself. That isn't to throw shade your way. This is constructive criticism that you NEED by old niggahz who can school you the right way.


This old niggah you messin' with is insecure about what it is that both of you supposedly have with one another. He's already let you know that as far as getting serious with you for some long haul shit, you're not the one and it aint TOTALLY on YOU.

He's OLD. You have MANY years ahead of you before YOU get OLD and have very limited resources for a good lover...especially if you don't ever develop into a good lover ( sexually and NONE Sexually ).

I don't know whether or not you've ever been molested at some point in your short life where you get all pissy about somebody you don't know paying you a compliment that often goes very sexual. You may NOT have been around very many Black and Latino men to know that we often do this and it doesn't always mean that we're trying to get up in them draws!

Unlike me, the average male lies 65% of the time about his sexual desires and extra curricular activities! So when I tell you something sexual, there's only about a 5% chance of SOME untruth I, personally speaking will say!

Getting back to your old nigger long distance lover: He's an old niggah who's keeping his limits options open mostly because much like ME, he's already seen something in your personality that dictates that you're FAR from ready to be in a relationship with an old niggah!

From everything that I've learned about you in the very brief amount of time you and I personally communicated, you have a whole lot of your shit together. The experience in dealing with people on some levels and how you process and deal with matters most likely is the main issue scaring the old man off!

He just may be one of the millions of nigger men who can't verbally communicate effectively and maturely... but wanna have bitch festivals and pity parties with other dumb faggy niggahz and never take ownership of their shit.

I can tell how you've dealt with ME personally via TEXT messaging/SnapChat/BGC Live private messaging that YOU haven't learned more mature ways in dealing with other dudes when there's a little rift or miscommunication.

Given the selection of people who scour and participate on social media...especially this site, I can pretty much see how you'd be how you are. I'm not saying that you're such this God Awful person neither. You certainly are NOT a horrible human being. That spot is reserved for the likes of bird-fu. lovepeacesoul1 and lose-ya-breath!

But ANYWAYS....

To keep putting shit blunt to you, you need to cut your loses with gramps and keep it moving on to someone who can emotionally and physically meet the demands and or needs you have. And stop getting pissy about someone with a healthy and strong sexual appetite letting your know that you look good enough eat up. Men DO that.

When the shit gets too uncomfortable for you to bare hearing, tell his ass to back up from the compliments. If they don't stop, then YOU stop fuckin' with him. Again, you're sexy as fuckin hell and dudes are going to wanna compliment you based upon their own amazement that you even give them the time of day!

No need to be a bitch about it.

To sum this all up, based on what you've stated, YOU'RE not the one for him and YOU need to get over it! He's actually doing YOU a favor by trying to treat you like a fuck toy. Accept that title from him and move on to another land where there IS no such title in existence.

Actually, you blocked me. But thanks.



 
Post Posted: 2018-03-13 18:19:34  
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2018-03-13 16:37:08

Very interesting. You got all pissy and childish with me about a misunderstanding, but you put my ass on block!

If you're down for "listening" to me, I'll start off by saying that you ARE extremely attractive physically.

Your work ethic and moral compass seems to far exceed expectations of the average Negro Male well over age 50, so in a manner of speaking, you're a bit too mature ( in some ways ) than most.

I'll assume that this old niggah you've allowed yourself to get SPRUNG on is at least a fairly attractive looking old niggah!

The only person being playing is YOU playing yourself. That isn't to throw shade your way. This is constructive criticism that you NEED by old niggahz who can school you the right way.


This old niggah you messin' with is insecure about what it is that both of you supposedly have with one another. He's already let you know that as far as getting serious with you for some long haul shit, you're not the one and it aint TOTALLY on YOU.

He's OLD. You have MANY years ahead of you before YOU get OLD and have very limited resources for a good lover...especially if you don't ever develop into a good lover ( sexually and NONE Sexually ).

I don't know whether or not you've ever been molested at some point in your short life where you get all pissy about somebody you don't know paying you a compliment that often goes very sexual. You may NOT have been around very many Black and Latino men to know that we often do this and it doesn't always mean that we're trying to get up in them draws!

Unlike me, the average male lies 65% of the time about his sexual desires and extra curricular activities! So when I tell you something sexual, there's only about a 5% chance of SOME untruth I, personally speaking will say!

Getting back to your old nigger long distance lover: He's an old niggah who's keeping his limits options open mostly because much like ME, he's already seen something in your personality that dictates that you're FAR from ready to be in a relationship with an old niggah!

From everything that I've learned about you in the very brief amount of time you and I personally communicated, you have a whole lot of your shit together. The experience in dealing with people on some levels and how you process and deal with matters most likely is the main issue scaring the old man off!

He just may be one of the millions of nigger men who can't verbally communicate effectively and maturely... but wanna have bitch festivals and pity parties with other dumb faggy niggahz and never take ownership of their shit.

I can tell how you've dealt with ME personally via TEXT messaging/SnapChat/BGC Live private messaging that YOU haven't learned more mature ways in dealing with other dudes when there's a little rift or miscommunication.

Given the selection of people who scour and participate on social media...especially this site, I can pretty much see how you'd be how you are. I'm not saying that you're such this God Awful person neither. You certainly are NOT a horrible human being. That spot is reserved for the likes of bird-fu. lovepeacesoul1 and lose-ya-breath!

But ANYWAYS....

To keep putting shit blunt to you, you need to cut your loses with gramps and keep it moving on to someone who can emotionally and physically meet the demands and or needs you have. And stop getting pissy about someone with a healthy and strong sexual appetite letting your know that you look good enough eat up. Men DO that.

When the shit gets too uncomfortable for you to bare hearing, tell his ass to back up from the compliments. If they don't stop, then YOU stop fuckin' with him. Again, you're sexy as fuckin hell and dudes are going to wanna compliment you based upon their own amazement that you even give them the time of day!

No need to be a bitch about it.

To sum this all up, based on what you've stated, YOU'RE not the one for him and YOU need to get over it! He's actually doing YOU a favor by trying to treat you like a fuck toy. Accept that title from him and move on to another land where there IS no such title in existence.

2018-03-13 18:16:32

Actually, you blocked me. But thanks.

I guess that I'm getting really old and more senile at 51! My bad!
 
Post Posted: 2018-03-13 18:25:15  
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2018-03-13 16:37:08

Very interesting. You got all pissy and childish with me about a misunderstanding, but you put my ass on block!

If you're down for "listening" to me, I'll start off by saying that you ARE extremely attractive physically.

Your work ethic and moral compass seems to far exceed expectations of the average Negro Male well over age 50, so in a manner of speaking, you're a bit too mature ( in some ways ) than most.

I'll assume that this old niggah you've allowed yourself to get SPRUNG on is at least a fairly attractive looking old niggah!

The only person being playing is YOU playing yourself. That isn't to throw shade your way. This is constructive criticism that you NEED by old niggahz who can school you the right way.


This old niggah you messin' with is insecure about what it is that both of you supposedly have with one another. He's already let you know that as far as getting serious with you for some long haul shit, you're not the one and it aint TOTALLY on YOU.

He's OLD. You have MANY years ahead of you before YOU get OLD and have very limited resources for a good lover...especially if you don't ever develop into a good lover ( sexually and NONE Sexually ).

I don't know whether or not you've ever been molested at some point in your short life where you get all pissy about somebody you don't know paying you a compliment that often goes very sexual. You may NOT have been around very many Black and Latino men to know that we often do this and it doesn't always mean that we're trying to get up in them draws!

Unlike me, the average male lies 65% of the time about his sexual desires and extra curricular activities! So when I tell you something sexual, there's only about a 5% chance of SOME untruth I, personally speaking will say!

Getting back to your old nigger long distance lover: He's an old niggah who's keeping his limits options open mostly because much like ME, he's already seen something in your personality that dictates that you're FAR from ready to be in a relationship with an old niggah!

From everything that I've learned about you in the very brief amount of time you and I personally communicated, you have a whole lot of your shit together. The experience in dealing with people on some levels and how you process and deal with matters most likely is the main issue scaring the old man off!

He just may be one of the millions of nigger men who can't verbally communicate effectively and maturely... but wanna have bitch festivals and pity parties with other dumb faggy niggahz and never take ownership of their shit.

I can tell how you've dealt with ME personally via TEXT messaging/SnapChat/BGC Live private messaging that YOU haven't learned more mature ways in dealing with other dudes when there's a little rift or miscommunication.

Given the selection of people who scour and participate on social media...especially this site, I can pretty much see how you'd be how you are. I'm not saying that you're such this God Awful person neither. You certainly are NOT a horrible human being. That spot is reserved for the likes of bird-fu. lovepeacesoul1 and lose-ya-breath!

But ANYWAYS....

To keep putting shit blunt to you, you need to cut your loses with gramps and keep it moving on to someone who can emotionally and physically meet the demands and or needs you have. And stop getting pissy about someone with a healthy and strong sexual appetite letting your know that you look good enough eat up. Men DO that.

When the shit gets too uncomfortable for you to bare hearing, tell his ass to back up from the compliments. If they don't stop, then YOU stop fuckin' with him. Again, you're sexy as fuckin hell and dudes are going to wanna compliment you based upon their own amazement that you even give them the time of day!

No need to be a bitch about it.

To sum this all up, based on what you've stated, YOU'RE not the one for him and YOU need to get over it! He's actually doing YOU a favor by trying to treat you like a fuck toy. Accept that title from him and move on to another land where there IS no such title in existence.

Well, I appreciate you giving it to me raw and uncut.


To answer your questions, no I\'ve never been molested. But I think the thing that irks me about gay men is the constant obsession with the physical. The obsession over how people look and dress, rather than other qualities that make solidify their potential as long term lovers.

How many cute boys have you met who had horrible personalities, nothing to say, full of games, drama, etc. Probably 8 out of 10. How many gay boys do you know that are keeping up with the Jonses\'s, jetting around the world to pride events, stay in the clubs with a body of Adonis sleeping on somebody\'s floor? Probably 9 out of 10.

I appreciate him telling me about how I look. I used to have a big weight/acne problem back in the day, so its nice to see that I\'ve gotten over that and flourished. But honestly after a while it gets tiring. I could be like \"It\'s snowing outside!\" and he\'ll go \"I wanna come lick some snow out of your ass.\" It gets old. I admit, i\'m sexually attracted to him , but I think i\'ve been able to see beyond the physical. Why can\'t he do the same?

Overall, I\'m just worried that he\'s in LUST and he\'s confusing those feelings for really feeling me. We know how that goes.
 
Post Posted: 2018-03-13 18:26:29  
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2018-03-13 16:37:08

Well maybe you need an Adderall or a Ritalin, cause it wasnt that much to read.
 
Post Posted: 2018-03-13 18:33:40  
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2018-03-13 16:37:08

Alright, so here’s the thing. I’ve been talking to this for about 3 months now. It’s long distance (about 800 miles 2 hr flight) and there’s a 24 year age gap. There isn’t a sugar daddy thing, or anything like that. I’ve never taken money from him or asked him to buy me things and don’t plan on doing it. We’ve had a few head butts here and there but nothing too serious. I did distance myself from him for about 3 weeks after a small fight we had about him being somewhat of a high-maintenance diva at times and coldhearted, but we’ve recently made up and things have been fine ever since. This past weekend I called him out on something. Basically, every chance he gets he turns a conversation sexual. He’s always complimenting my body, how I look, my ass etc. I know I look good, but I’m not shallow. I don’t get open off complements. I rather him said other things about my personality, how he loves talking to me, how I make him feel, etc. Anyway, after I said something about it he apologized and said he would stop it. I apologized for being oversensitive cause I know I’m no Virgin Mary, but it had me thinking. Basically this is what happened (Actual texts):

Note: The **’s aren’t what was said, just what I picked up from the what he told me.

Me: I guess I was just feeling some type of way cause I still don’t know how you feel about me.

Him: No worries, just know you’re a very sexy man. ** Translation: You make my dick hard, but that’s about it. OR I feel strongly about you and don\\\'t want to scare you away**

Me: That’s it? What do you feel towards me other than that?

(No replies yet)

I doubled texts like a bitch, but whatever: I don’t want to assume or jump to conclusions so could you tell me please? Once again, trying to get clarity on the situation

Him: Sorry for the late response, I was on the phone. I think you’re an amazing guy, very thoughtful, compassionate, a lot of curiosities and interest. Translation: You have good qualities, or I’ve probably told 100s of guys this.

Me: How do I make you feel? Do you see this going anywhere, do you want to be with me or you don’t know? You won’t hurt my feelings.

Him: I know the gay life is something new for you which can be scary which is totally understandable. You want to be loved and respected. And you want honesty. Translation: Once again, I’m going to supercoat it and dance around the question OR I know how you feel, I\\\'ve been there before.

Him: Where is this coming from?

Me: I just like having clarity. I don’t mean to come off as I’m pressuring you. We’ve been talking a while and time and energy is being invested

Him: You make me feel good, excited, nervous, angry, and frustrated. You make me thinking about what I’m saying or not saying.

Him: I enjoy talking to you and seeing your face.

Him: I enjoy talking about the future and really think and believe there could be a future.

Him: You make me feel young , but remind me that I’m older, and I have more life experience.

Him: I’m excited about getting to know you more, but afraid of getting closer. Translation: Either I’ve been hurt in the past or I’m giving you an excuse for wasting your time

Me: Why?

Him: I’m afraid of losing you to the military, or the gay life style. **Translation: You’re attractive and I know you have access to better guys than me or I\\\'m giving you an excuse, or I'm geuinely afraid**

Me: I don’t care about the gay lifestyle, and have no interest in it. It’s vain, superficial and full of promiscuous men looking for their next fix. Basically, I’m asking you this because…I want you to be my boyfriend.** Me being completely honest about how I feel, I’m a one man’s man. Once we’re together, it’s just us.**

Him: You’re sweet, but we should work on seeing each other a little more and getting to know each other better. I’m not going anywhere. Translation: I want to have my cake and eat it, too. I want to continue meeting up with you, accessing your body, hanging out with no strings. If something better comes along or I get bored, I can break away with a clear conscious. Or I wanna take things slow and get to know you better.

Me: Thank you for being honest.

Him: No problem. Are you OK?

Me: Yes.

Him: Ok, sleep well. Talk tomorrow.

Now I was feeling stupid all Monday, so I texted him and basically told him I wouldn’t be coming to visit him for my birthday next month. He was upset and outraged and cursed me out and said he knew I was gonna disappear and run from him, etc. He said guys are always coming to his life and leaving. After that he asked if I was ok and apologized and said he does care about me, etc. After I calmed down, I told him i’m still coming and that hopefully we can move on from this. We’ve been doing ok. Here’s my question

Bros, am I being played? I’m afraid I’m being strung along. I feel like I’m just this boy-toy that he wants to meet up with every so often, roll around in the sack, get his rocks off and find me again when he wants another round. He can talk so vividly about sex, what he wants to do to my body, but when I bring up the subject of us I get vague answers or just “Let’s see what happens”. I also don’t feel that way cause we talk daily, he’s always talking about future plans that involve us and is constantly reminding me of my passport cause he wants to take trips abroad with me. I can’t shake this feeling that he doesn’t like me in that same way I do or that I’m just a placeholder until another cute piece of ass comes along. He\\\'s older and we know how the gay community treats guys in their 50s. Does he not take me seriously cause of my age, or is he so jaded from being older and can't make meaningful connections anymore? I do have a habit of overreacting and jumping to conclusions, but I think because emotions are involved I can’t see straight. Can someone please give me some non-biased, non-BS non-PC advice? I need help. I’m man enough to admit I do like him and whenever I think about him my heart races, but also strong enough to walk away if the feeling isnt mutual. I’m not looking to get married or go get matching neck tattoos, but I would at least like to know if this is going somewhere and not wasting my time. Those weekend flights and airport parking ain’t cheap.

Tl;dr Am I Being played?

Grammar might be shitty, i typed this is a flurry.

1. The man is in his 50s ... his Fifties ... Fifties ...
2. "I’m afraid of losing you to the military, or the gay life style."

 
Post Posted: 2018-03-13 18:39:06  
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2018-03-13 16:37:08

Alright, so here’s the thing. I’ve been talking to this for about 3 months now. It’s long distance (about 800 miles 2 hr flight) and there’s a 24 year age gap. There isn’t a sugar daddy thing, or anything like that. I’ve never taken money from him or asked him to buy me things and don’t plan on doing it. We’ve had a few head butts here and there but nothing too serious. I did distance myself from him for about 3 weeks after a small fight we had about him being somewhat of a high-maintenance diva at times and coldhearted, but we’ve recently made up and things have been fine ever since. This past weekend I called him out on something. Basically, every chance he gets he turns a conversation sexual. He’s always complimenting my body, how I look, my ass etc. I know I look good, but I’m not shallow. I don’t get open off complements. I rather him said other things about my personality, how he loves talking to me, how I make him feel, etc. Anyway, after I said something about it he apologized and said he would stop it. I apologized for being oversensitive cause I know I’m no Virgin Mary, but it had me thinking. Basically this is what happened (Actual texts):

Note: The **’s aren’t what was said, just what I picked up from the what he told me.

Me: I guess I was just feeling some type of way cause I still don’t know how you feel about me.

Him: No worries, just know you’re a very sexy man. ** Translation: You make my dick hard, but that’s about it. OR I feel strongly about you and don\\\'t want to scare you away**

Me: That’s it? What do you feel towards me other than that?

(No replies yet)

I doubled texts like a bitch, but whatever: I don’t want to assume or jump to conclusions so could you tell me please? Once again, trying to get clarity on the situation

Him: Sorry for the late response, I was on the phone. I think you’re an amazing guy, very thoughtful, compassionate, a lot of curiosities and interest. Translation: You have good qualities, or I’ve probably told 100s of guys this.

Me: How do I make you feel? Do you see this going anywhere, do you want to be with me or you don’t know? You won’t hurt my feelings.

Him: I know the gay life is something new for you which can be scary which is totally understandable. You want to be loved and respected. And you want honesty. Translation: Once again, I’m going to supercoat it and dance around the question OR I know how you feel, I\\\'ve been there before.

Him: Where is this coming from?

Me: I just like having clarity. I don’t mean to come off as I’m pressuring you. We’ve been talking a while and time and energy is being invested

Him: You make me feel good, excited, nervous, angry, and frustrated. You make me thinking about what I’m saying or not saying.

Him: I enjoy talking to you and seeing your face.

Him: I enjoy talking about the future and really think and believe there could be a future.

Him: You make me feel young , but remind me that I’m older, and I have more life experience.

Him: I’m excited about getting to know you more, but afraid of getting closer. Translation: Either I’ve been hurt in the past or I’m giving you an excuse for wasting your time

Me: Why?

Him: I’m afraid of losing you to the military, or the gay life style. **Translation: You’re attractive and I know you have access to better guys than me or I\\\'m giving you an excuse, or I'm geuinely afraid**

Me: I don’t care about the gay lifestyle, and have no interest in it. It’s vain, superficial and full of promiscuous men looking for their next fix. Basically, I’m asking you this because…I want you to be my boyfriend.** Me being completely honest about how I feel, I’m a one man’s man. Once we’re together, it’s just us.**

Him: You’re sweet, but we should work on seeing each other a little more and getting to know each other better. I’m not going anywhere. Translation: I want to have my cake and eat it, too. I want to continue meeting up with you, accessing your body, hanging out with no strings. If something better comes along or I get bored, I can break away with a clear conscious. Or I wanna take things slow and get to know you better.

Me: Thank you for being honest.

Him: No problem. Are you OK?

Me: Yes.

Him: Ok, sleep well. Talk tomorrow.

Now I was feeling stupid all Monday, so I texted him and basically told him I wouldn’t be coming to visit him for my birthday next month. He was upset and outraged and cursed me out and said he knew I was gonna disappear and run from him, etc. He said guys are always coming to his life and leaving. After that he asked if I was ok and apologized and said he does care about me, etc. After I calmed down, I told him i’m still coming and that hopefully we can move on from this. We’ve been doing ok. Here’s my question

Bros, am I being played? I’m afraid I’m being strung along. I feel like I’m just this boy-toy that he wants to meet up with every so often, roll around in the sack, get his rocks off and find me again when he wants another round. He can talk so vividly about sex, what he wants to do to my body, but when I bring up the subject of us I get vague answers or just “Let’s see what happens”. I also don’t feel that way cause we talk daily, he’s always talking about future plans that involve us and is constantly reminding me of my passport cause he wants to take trips abroad with me. I can’t shake this feeling that he doesn’t like me in that same way I do or that I’m just a placeholder until another cute piece of ass comes along. He\\\'s older and we know how the gay community treats guys in their 50s. Does he not take me seriously cause of my age, or is he so jaded from being older and can't make meaningful connections anymore? I do have a habit of overreacting and jumping to conclusions, but I think because emotions are involved I can’t see straight. Can someone please give me some non-biased, non-BS non-PC advice? I need help. I’m man enough to admit I do like him and whenever I think about him my heart races, but also strong enough to walk away if the feeling isnt mutual. I’m not looking to get married or go get matching neck tattoos, but I would at least like to know if this is going somewhere and not wasting my time. Those weekend flights and airport parking ain’t cheap.

Tl;dr Am I Being played?

Grammar might be shitty, i typed this is a flurry.



So the question you will have to ask yourself:

1. Do I like this dude - if yes, then hang in there, and let it work itself out. Every new and even old relationships have kinks and every relationship starts with an attraction, then with sex and then everything else falls into place.

If you don`t want to hang in there and/or have more unanswered question than answered, then let it go, but by doing that you could be missing out on a good man or you may save yourself from getting hurt and disappointed.

2. You cannot and should not ask a man how he feels about you. Some men can show a person better than they can tell a person how they feel. He could be scared, unsure, confused and probably doesn`t know how you really feel or if you are going to stay around. I mean you make your mouth say anything, just like he can - but the end result is there is always one person in the relationship that is more involved than the other - that`s just a given. You may be more advanced in what you want than he is.

3. Also you cannot ask this man questions about what he feels and then when he responds, you counter his response with a negative or translation that you are feeling. It pretty much defeats the purpose of asking him if you already have your own answer.

4. I think you have too many hangups and expectations that are striking more fear in him....I also think you play mind games in order for him to express how he feels, in the case of you saying you where not going to visit him to get a reaction and then turned around and said you would go visit made him react, but you wouldn`t want to make a habit of doing that because it would be expected and when it doesn`t turn out like it did the first few times, then you will be very disappointed.

At this point, I think you should do some deep soul searching and weight the pro`s and con`s of this relationship...and if you have more con`s than pro`s, you need to let it go.




 
Post Posted: 2018-03-13 18:49:14  
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2018-03-13 16:37:08

Alright, so here’s the thing. I’ve been talking to this for about 3 months now. It’s long distance (about 800 miles 2 hr flight) and there’s a 24 year age gap. There isn’t a sugar daddy thing, or anything like that. I’ve never taken money from him or asked him to buy me things and don’t plan on doing it. We’ve had a few head butts here and there but nothing too serious. I did distance myself from him for about 3 weeks after a small fight we had about him being somewhat of a high-maintenance diva at times and coldhearted, but we’ve recently made up and things have been fine ever since. This past weekend I called him out on something. Basically, every chance he gets he turns a conversation sexual. He’s always complimenting my body, how I look, my ass etc. I know I look good, but I’m not shallow. I don’t get open off complements. I rather him said other things about my personality, how he loves talking to me, how I make him feel, etc. Anyway, after I said something about it he apologized and said he would stop it. I apologized for being oversensitive cause I know I’m no Virgin Mary, but it had me thinking. Basically this is what happened (Actual texts):

Note: The **’s aren’t what was said, just what I picked up from the what he told me.

Me: I guess I was just feeling some type of way cause I still don’t know how you feel about me.

Him: No worries, just know you’re a very sexy man. ** Translation: You make my dick hard, but that’s about it. OR I feel strongly about you and don\\\'t want to scare you away**

Me: That’s it? What do you feel towards me other than that?

(No replies yet)

I doubled texts like a bitch, but whatever: I don’t want to assume or jump to conclusions so could you tell me please? Once again, trying to get clarity on the situation

Him: Sorry for the late response, I was on the phone. I think you’re an amazing guy, very thoughtful, compassionate, a lot of curiosities and interest. Translation: You have good qualities, or I’ve probably told 100s of guys this.

Me: How do I make you feel? Do you see this going anywhere, do you want to be with me or you don’t know? You won’t hurt my feelings.

Him: I know the gay life is something new for you which can be scary which is totally understandable. You want to be loved and respected. And you want honesty. Translation: Once again, I’m going to supercoat it and dance around the question OR I know how you feel, I\\\'ve been there before.

Him: Where is this coming from?

Me: I just like having clarity. I don’t mean to come off as I’m pressuring you. We’ve been talking a while and time and energy is being invested

Him: You make me feel good, excited, nervous, angry, and frustrated. You make me thinking about what I’m saying or not saying.

Him: I enjoy talking to you and seeing your face.

Him: I enjoy talking about the future and really think and believe there could be a future.

Him: You make me feel young , but remind me that I’m older, and I have more life experience.

Him: I’m excited about getting to know you more, but afraid of getting closer. Translation: Either I’ve been hurt in the past or I’m giving you an excuse for wasting your time

Me: Why?

Him: I’m afraid of losing you to the military, or the gay life style. **Translation: You’re attractive and I know you have access to better guys than me or I\\\'m giving you an excuse, or I'm geuinely afraid**

Me: I don’t care about the gay lifestyle, and have no interest in it. It’s vain, superficial and full of promiscuous men looking for their next fix. Basically, I’m asking you this because…I want you to be my boyfriend.** Me being completely honest about how I feel, I’m a one man’s man. Once we’re together, it’s just us.**

Him: You’re sweet, but we should work on seeing each other a little more and getting to know each other better. I’m not going anywhere. Translation: I want to have my cake and eat it, too. I want to continue meeting up with you, accessing your body, hanging out with no strings. If something better comes along or I get bored, I can break away with a clear conscious. Or I wanna take things slow and get to know you better.

Me: Thank you for being honest.

Him: No problem. Are you OK?

Me: Yes.

Him: Ok, sleep well. Talk tomorrow.

Now I was feeling stupid all Monday, so I texted him and basically told him I wouldn’t be coming to visit him for my birthday next month. He was upset and outraged and cursed me out and said he knew I was gonna disappear and run from him, etc. He said guys are always coming to his life and leaving. After that he asked if I was ok and apologized and said he does care about me, etc. After I calmed down, I told him i’m still coming and that hopefully we can move on from this. We’ve been doing ok. Here’s my question

Bros, am I being played? I’m afraid I’m being strung along. I feel like I’m just this boy-toy that he wants to meet up with every so often, roll around in the sack, get his rocks off and find me again when he wants another round. He can talk so vividly about sex, what he wants to do to my body, but when I bring up the subject of us I get vague answers or just “Let’s see what happens”. I also don’t feel that way cause we talk daily, he’s always talking about future plans that involve us and is constantly reminding me of my passport cause he wants to take trips abroad with me. I can’t shake this feeling that he doesn’t like me in that same way I do or that I’m just a placeholder until another cute piece of ass comes along. He\\\'s older and we know how the gay community treats guys in their 50s. Does he not take me seriously cause of my age, or is he so jaded from being older and can't make meaningful connections anymore? I do have a habit of overreacting and jumping to conclusions, but I think because emotions are involved I can’t see straight. Can someone please give me some non-biased, non-BS non-PC advice? I need help. I’m man enough to admit I do like him and whenever I think about him my heart races, but also strong enough to walk away if the feeling isnt mutual. I’m not looking to get married or go get matching neck tattoos, but I would at least like to know if this is going somewhere and not wasting my time. Those weekend flights and airport parking ain’t cheap.

Tl;dr Am I Being played?

Grammar might be shitty, i typed this is a flurry.

2018-03-13 18:39:06



So the question you will have to ask yourself:

1. Do I like this dude - if yes, then hang in there, and let it work itself out. Every new and even old relationships have kinks and every relationship starts with an attraction, then with sex and then everything else falls into place.

If you don`t want to hang in there and/or have more unanswered question than answered, then let it go, but by doing that you could be missing out on a good man or you may save yourself from getting hurt and disappointed.

2. You cannot and should not ask a man how he feels about you. Some men can show a person better than they can tell a person how they feel. He could be scared, unsure, confused and probably doesn`t know how you really feel or if you are going to stay around. I mean you make your mouth say anything, just like he can - but the end result is there is always one person in the relationship that is more involved than the other - that`s just a given. You may be more advanced in what you want than he is.

3. Also you cannot ask this man questions about what he feels and then when he responds, you counter his response with a negative or translation that you are feeling. It pretty much defeats the purpose of asking him if you already have your own answer.

4. I think you have too many hangups and expectations that are striking more fear in him....I also think you play mind games in order for him to express how he feels, in the case of you saying you where not going to visit him to get a reaction and then turned around and said you would go visit made him react, but you wouldn`t want to make a habit of doing that because it would be expected and when it doesn`t turn out like it did the first few times, then you will be very disappointed.

At this point, I think you should do some deep soul searching and weight the pro`s and con`s of this relationship...and if you have more con`s than pro`s, you need to let it go.

I wasnt playing mind games when I said I wasnt coming, I genuinely felt that way and was on the phone with DELTA cancelling my ticket.

I'm feeling some typa way because he isn't being forthright with how he feels about how from a non-sexual standpoint. He can type paragraphs about eating ass and sucking my toes, but can't give me any type of expression when it comes to what he's looking for.

Do you expect a leasing company to rent to you without signing a contract? Do you invest your savings in a depreciating asset? It's the same thing.


You are right about some times, though. I can't read his mind and i'm not trying to. I'll take approach this with some caution, but I'll definitively be mindful of my emotional investments.
 
Post Posted: 2018-03-13 18:49:54  
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2018-03-13 16:37:08

2018-03-13 17:19:28

It's actually very good reading and falls within the scope of reaching out and helping these young brothas navigate through all of the fuckery in today's times!

He's actually a very good brotha, but just a bit young and inexperienced. He needs proper guidance from us old niggahz!

The generations of "men" in the Black community has been getting shittier and shittier with every group reaching the age of consent! Very UnCute!

Cop the brotha some slack. He's actually a good dude. Again, he's just young and inexperienced !

thanks, handsome
 
Post Posted: 2018-03-13 18:50:35  
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2018-03-13 16:37:08

Alright, so here’s the thing. I’ve been talking to this for about 3 months now. It’s long distance (about 800 miles 2 hr flight) and there’s a 24 year age gap. There isn’t a sugar daddy thing, or anything like that. I’ve never taken money from him or asked him to buy me things and don’t plan on doing it. We’ve had a few head butts here and there but nothing too serious. I did distance myself from him for about 3 weeks after a small fight we had about him being somewhat of a high-maintenance diva at times and coldhearted, but we’ve recently made up and things have been fine ever since. This past weekend I called him out on something. Basically, every chance he gets he turns a conversation sexual. He’s always complimenting my body, how I look, my ass etc. I know I look good, but I’m not shallow. I don’t get open off complements. I rather him said other things about my personality, how he loves talking to me, how I make him feel, etc. Anyway, after I said something about it he apologized and said he would stop it. I apologized for being oversensitive cause I know I’m no Virgin Mary, but it had me thinking. Basically this is what happened (Actual texts):

Note: The **’s aren’t what was said, just what I picked up from the what he told me.

Me: I guess I was just feeling some type of way cause I still don’t know how you feel about me.

Him: No worries, just know you’re a very sexy man. ** Translation: You make my dick hard, but that’s about it. OR I feel strongly about you and don\\\'t want to scare you away**

Me: That’s it? What do you feel towards me other than that?

(No replies yet)

I doubled texts like a bitch, but whatever: I don’t want to assume or jump to conclusions so could you tell me please? Once again, trying to get clarity on the situation

Him: Sorry for the late response, I was on the phone. I think you’re an amazing guy, very thoughtful, compassionate, a lot of curiosities and interest. Translation: You have good qualities, or I’ve probably told 100s of guys this.

Me: How do I make you feel? Do you see this going anywhere, do you want to be with me or you don’t know? You won’t hurt my feelings.

Him: I know the gay life is something new for you which can be scary which is totally understandable. You want to be loved and respected. And you want honesty. Translation: Once again, I’m going to supercoat it and dance around the question OR I know how you feel, I\\\'ve been there before.

Him: Where is this coming from?

Me: I just like having clarity. I don’t mean to come off as I’m pressuring you. We’ve been talking a while and time and energy is being invested

Him: You make me feel good, excited, nervous, angry, and frustrated. You make me thinking about what I’m saying or not saying.

Him: I enjoy talking to you and seeing your face.

Him: I enjoy talking about the future and really think and believe there could be a future.

Him: You make me feel young , but remind me that I’m older, and I have more life experience.

Him: I’m excited about getting to know you more, but afraid of getting closer. Translation: Either I’ve been hurt in the past or I’m giving you an excuse for wasting your time

Me: Why?

Him: I’m afraid of losing you to the military, or the gay life style. **Translation: You’re attractive and I know you have access to better guys than me or I\\\'m giving you an excuse, or I'm geuinely afraid**

Me: I don’t care about the gay lifestyle, and have no interest in it. It’s vain, superficial and full of promiscuous men looking for their next fix. Basically, I’m asking you this because…I want you to be my boyfriend.** Me being completely honest about how I feel, I’m a one man’s man. Once we’re together, it’s just us.**

Him: You’re sweet, but we should work on seeing each other a little more and getting to know each other better. I’m not going anywhere. Translation: I want to have my cake and eat it, too. I want to continue meeting up with you, accessing your body, hanging out with no strings. If something better comes along or I get bored, I can break away with a clear conscious. Or I wanna take things slow and get to know you better.

Me: Thank you for being honest.

Him: No problem. Are you OK?

Me: Yes.

Him: Ok, sleep well. Talk tomorrow.

Now I was feeling stupid all Monday, so I texted him and basically told him I wouldn’t be coming to visit him for my birthday next month. He was upset and outraged and cursed me out and said he knew I was gonna disappear and run from him, etc. He said guys are always coming to his life and leaving. After that he asked if I was ok and apologized and said he does care about me, etc. After I calmed down, I told him i’m still coming and that hopefully we can move on from this. We’ve been doing ok. Here’s my question

Bros, am I being played? I’m afraid I’m being strung along. I feel like I’m just this boy-toy that he wants to meet up with every so often, roll around in the sack, get his rocks off and find me again when he wants another round. He can talk so vividly about sex, what he wants to do to my body, but when I bring up the subject of us I get vague answers or just “Let’s see what happens”. I also don’t feel that way cause we talk daily, he’s always talking about future plans that involve us and is constantly reminding me of my passport cause he wants to take trips abroad with me. I can’t shake this feeling that he doesn’t like me in that same way I do or that I’m just a placeholder until another cute piece of ass comes along. He\\\'s older and we know how the gay community treats guys in their 50s. Does he not take me seriously cause of my age, or is he so jaded from being older and can't make meaningful connections anymore? I do have a habit of overreacting and jumping to conclusions, but I think because emotions are involved I can’t see straight. Can someone please give me some non-biased, non-BS non-PC advice? I need help. I’m man enough to admit I do like him and whenever I think about him my heart races, but also strong enough to walk away if the feeling isnt mutual. I’m not looking to get married or go get matching neck tattoos, but I would at least like to know if this is going somewhere and not wasting my time. Those weekend flights and airport parking ain’t cheap.

Tl;dr Am I Being played?

Grammar might be shitty, i typed this is a flurry.

2018-03-13 18:33:40

1. The man is in his 50s ... his Fifties ... Fifties ...
2. "I’m afraid of losing you to the military, or the gay life style."

His age actually doesnt bother me at all. He's more insecure about it then I am.
 
Post Posted: 2018-03-13 18:50:39  
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2018-03-13 16:37:08

Very interesting. You got all pissy and childish with me about a misunderstanding, but you put my ass on block!

If you're down for "listening" to me, I'll start off by saying that you ARE extremely attractive physically.

Your work ethic and moral compass seems to far exceed expectations of the average Negro Male well over age 50, so in a manner of speaking, you're a bit too mature ( in some ways ) than most.

I'll assume that this old niggah you've allowed yourself to get SPRUNG on is at least a fairly attractive looking old niggah!

The only person being playing is YOU playing yourself. That isn't to throw shade your way. This is constructive criticism that you NEED by old niggahz who can school you the right way.


This old niggah you messin' with is insecure about what it is that both of you supposedly have with one another. He's already let you know that as far as getting serious with you for some long haul shit, you're not the one and it aint TOTALLY on YOU.

He's OLD. You have MANY years ahead of you before YOU get OLD and have very limited resources for a good lover...especially if you don't ever develop into a good lover ( sexually and NONE Sexually ).

I don't know whether or not you've ever been molested at some point in your short life where you get all pissy about somebody you don't know paying you a compliment that often goes very sexual. You may NOT have been around very many Black and Latino men to know that we often do this and it doesn't always mean that we're trying to get up in them draws!

Unlike me, the average male lies 65% of the time about his sexual desires and extra curricular activities! So when I tell you something sexual, there's only about a 5% chance of SOME untruth I, personally speaking will say!

Getting back to your old nigger long distance lover: He's an old niggah who's keeping his limits options open mostly because much like ME, he's already seen something in your personality that dictates that you're FAR from ready to be in a relationship with an old niggah!

From everything that I've learned about you in the very brief amount of time you and I personally communicated, you have a whole lot of your shit together. The experience in dealing with people on some levels and how you process and deal with matters most likely is the main issue scaring the old man off!

He just may be one of the millions of nigger men who can't verbally communicate effectively and maturely... but wanna have bitch festivals and pity parties with other dumb faggy niggahz and never take ownership of their shit.

I can tell how you've dealt with ME personally via TEXT messaging/SnapChat/BGC Live private messaging that YOU haven't learned more mature ways in dealing with other dudes when there's a little rift or miscommunication.

Given the selection of people who scour and participate on social media...especially this site, I can pretty much see how you'd be how you are. I'm not saying that you're such this God Awful person neither. You certainly are NOT a horrible human being. That spot is reserved for the likes of bird-fu. lovepeacesoul1 and lose-ya-breath!

But ANYWAYS....

To keep putting shit blunt to you, you need to cut your loses with gramps and keep it moving on to someone who can emotionally and physically meet the demands and or needs you have. And stop getting pissy about someone with a healthy and strong sexual appetite letting your know that you look good enough eat up. Men DO that.

When the shit gets too uncomfortable for you to bare hearing, tell his ass to back up from the compliments. If they don't stop, then YOU stop fuckin' with him. Again, you're sexy as fuckin hell and dudes are going to wanna compliment you based upon their own amazement that you even give them the time of day!

No need to be a bitch about it.

To sum this all up, based on what you've stated, YOU'RE not the one for him and YOU need to get over it! He's actually doing YOU a favor by trying to treat you like a fuck toy. Accept that title from him and move on to another land where there IS no such title in existence.

2018-03-13 18:25:15

Well, I appreciate you giving it to me raw and uncut.


To answer your questions, no I\'ve never been molested. But I think the thing that irks me about gay men is the constant obsession with the physical. The obsession over how people look and dress, rather than other qualities that make solidify their potential as long term lovers.

How many cute boys have you met who had horrible personalities, nothing to say, full of games, drama, etc. Probably 8 out of 10. How many gay boys do you know that are keeping up with the Jonses\'s, jetting around the world to pride events, stay in the clubs with a body of Adonis sleeping on somebody\'s floor? Probably 9 out of 10.

I appreciate him telling me about how I look. I used to have a big weight/acne problem back in the day, so its nice to see that I\'ve gotten over that and flourished. But honestly after a while it gets tiring. I could be like \"It\'s snowing outside!\" and he\'ll go \"I wanna come lick some snow out of your ass.\" It gets old. I admit, i\'m sexually attracted to him , but I think i\'ve been able to see beyond the physical. Why can\'t he do the same?

Overall, I\'m just worried that he\'s in LUST and he\'s confusing those feelings for really feeling me. We know how that goes.

His old ass is still battling whatever midlife crisis he's been in for over 10 years. He's not a good candidate for a bonafide suitable mate. He's Old and Broken!

The whole "Gay" lifestyle is exactly what white privileged homosexuals have made it to be wielding yet a little bit of that white supremacy tactics for the colored homos.

Anyways... this hyper sexualized society of faggots don't really have anything else to more proudly reach for because of how the littlest of things mired in love and more appropriate affection is more often demonized by the very same people who demonize homosexuality!

If that makes any sense, let me say this: Doing something nice for someone of the same sex that's known for going a little bit further for someone of the opposite sex.

Black females are REALLY big on noticing shit like that and will make even str8 men hate fuckin' with them.

Now don't let her call an otherwise heterosexual male a fag who just might be questioning himself regarding whether he wants to be bothered in ANY type of way with women...predomiately Black women!

Anywho...

There's a huge shortage of MATURE Black males in general who stand for something other than the typical shit we see most in The Gay World.

My advice to you is to stick to your guns and don't waste NO more time and energy on these niggahz who aren't on the same page that YOU are with regards to partnering and relationships.

These niggahz and bitches are so morally bankrupt these days, they're known for bringing whole nations of people to their knees with all sorts of poverty!

I don't want to come across as being bitter. I certainly have SOME reasons to be bitter, but I'm not. I'm just tired of lies and bullshit and these lies and bullshit being perpetuated and generations of Black males are becoming more and more torn to shreds.

As for the over complimenting you on your looks, believe it or not, I've been there where you're coming from.

I TOO was once massively overweight, had acne issues and even felt very awkward around a lot of people. I worked at it and got the weight off, the acne cleared up and then became a social butterfly, but had then developed a lot of haters. Those haters were people I would've never suspected to hate on me.

I'm FAR from the ugly fat troll ya gurl lovepeacesoul1 or Ms. Frank`eisha Hughes (leynnysvibe on YouTube) would suggest. She's that drunk nappy headed bitch with the horrible saddle bags under her slanted eyes, rotting teeth on her upper left side of her bloating face most likely due to some prescription steroid usage.

But I digress...

I don't know any other way to say this to you, but don't get so caught up and worried about what it is that has grandpa Negro on neglect mode. The way she's treating you is pretty much what she feels about herself for any number of reasons you just aint found out yet.

I can think of a number of reasons why Grandma is trippin'! Leave the bitch in the convalescent home where you found her and let the nurses take care of her!
 
Post Posted: 2018-03-13 18:52:43  
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2018-03-13 16:37:08

2018-03-13 17:19:28

It's actually very good reading and falls within the scope of reaching out and helping these young brothas navigate through all of the fuckery in today's times!

He's actually a very good brotha, but just a bit young and inexperienced. He needs proper guidance from us old niggahz!

The generations of "men" in the Black community has been getting shittier and shittier with every group reaching the age of consent! Very UnCute!

Cop the brotha some slack. He's actually a good dude. Again, he's just young and inexperienced !

2018-03-13 18:49:54

thanks, handsome

I'm just being honest! Can't say that much for a whole lot of niggahz on this site! Some raggedy bitches on here for real! LOL!
 
Post Posted: 2018-03-13 18:52:43  
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2018-03-13 16:37:08

 
Post Posted: 2018-03-13 18:56:36  
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2018-03-13 16:37:08

Very interesting. You got all pissy and childish with me about a misunderstanding, but you put my ass on block!

If you're down for "listening" to me, I'll start off by saying that you ARE extremely attractive physically.

Your work ethic and moral compass seems to far exceed expectations of the average Negro Male well over age 50, so in a manner of speaking, you're a bit too mature ( in some ways ) than most.

I'll assume that this old niggah you've allowed yourself to get SPRUNG on is at least a fairly attractive looking old niggah!

The only person being playing is YOU playing yourself. That isn't to throw shade your way. This is constructive criticism that you NEED by old niggahz who can school you the right way.


This old niggah you messin' with is insecure about what it is that both of you supposedly have with one another. He's already let you know that as far as getting serious with you for some long haul shit, you're not the one and it aint TOTALLY on YOU.

He's OLD. You have MANY years ahead of you before YOU get OLD and have very limited resources for a good lover...especially if you don't ever develop into a good lover ( sexually and NONE Sexually ).

I don't know whether or not you've ever been molested at some point in your short life where you get all pissy about somebody you don't know paying you a compliment that often goes very sexual. You may NOT have been around very many Black and Latino men to know that we often do this and it doesn't always mean that we're trying to get up in them draws!

Unlike me, the average male lies 65% of the time about his sexual desires and extra curricular activities! So when I tell you something sexual, there's only about a 5% chance of SOME untruth I, personally speaking will say!

Getting back to your old nigger long distance lover: He's an old niggah who's keeping his limits options open mostly because much like ME, he's already seen something in your personality that dictates that you're FAR from ready to be in a relationship with an old niggah!

From everything that I've learned about you in the very brief amount of time you and I personally communicated, you have a whole lot of your shit together. The experience in dealing with people on some levels and how you process and deal with matters most likely is the main issue scaring the old man off!

He just may be one of the millions of nigger men who can't verbally communicate effectively and maturely... but wanna have bitch festivals and pity parties with other dumb faggy niggahz and never take ownership of their shit.

I can tell how you've dealt with ME personally via TEXT messaging/SnapChat/BGC Live private messaging that YOU haven't learned more mature ways in dealing with other dudes when there's a little rift or miscommunication.

Given the selection of people who scour and participate on social media...especially this site, I can pretty much see how you'd be how you are. I'm not saying that you're such this God Awful person neither. You certainly are NOT a horrible human being. That spot is reserved for the likes of bird-fu. lovepeacesoul1 and lose-ya-breath!

But ANYWAYS....

To keep putting shit blunt to you, you need to cut your loses with gramps and keep it moving on to someone who can emotionally and physically meet the demands and or needs you have. And stop getting pissy about someone with a healthy and strong sexual appetite letting your know that you look good enough eat up. Men DO that.

When the shit gets too uncomfortable for you to bare hearing, tell his ass to back up from the compliments. If they don't stop, then YOU stop fuckin' with him. Again, you're sexy as fuckin hell and dudes are going to wanna compliment you based upon their own amazement that you even give them the time of day!

No need to be a bitch about it.

To sum this all up, based on what you've stated, YOU'RE not the one for him and YOU need to get over it! He's actually doing YOU a favor by trying to treat you like a fuck toy. Accept that title from him and move on to another land where there IS no such title in existence.

2018-03-13 18:25:15

Well, I appreciate you giving it to me raw and uncut.


To answer your questions, no I\'ve never been molested. But I think the thing that irks me about gay men is the constant obsession with the physical. The obsession over how people look and dress, rather than other qualities that make solidify their potential as long term lovers.

How many cute boys have you met who had horrible personalities, nothing to say, full of games, drama, etc. Probably 8 out of 10. How many gay boys do you know that are keeping up with the Jonses\'s, jetting around the world to pride events, stay in the clubs with a body of Adonis sleeping on somebody\'s floor? Probably 9 out of 10.

I appreciate him telling me about how I look. I used to have a big weight/acne problem back in the day, so its nice to see that I\'ve gotten over that and flourished. But honestly after a while it gets tiring. I could be like \"It\'s snowing outside!\" and he\'ll go \"I wanna come lick some snow out of your ass.\" It gets old. I admit, i\'m sexually attracted to him , but I think i\'ve been able to see beyond the physical. Why can\'t he do the same?

Overall, I\'m just worried that he\'s in LUST and he\'s confusing those feelings for really feeling me. We know how that goes.

2018-03-13 18:50:39

His old ass is still battling whatever midlife crisis he's been in for over 10 years. He's not a good candidate for a bonafide suitable mate. He's Old and Broken!

The whole "Gay" lifestyle is exactly what white privileged homosexuals have made it to be wielding yet a little bit of that white supremacy tactics for the colored homos.

Anyways... this hyper sexualized society of faggots don't really have anything else to more proudly reach for because of how the littlest of things mired in love and more appropriate affection is more often demonized by the very same people who demonize homosexuality!

If that makes any sense, let me say this: Doing something nice for someone of the same sex that's known for going a little bit further for someone of the opposite sex.

Black females are REALLY big on noticing shit like that and will make even str8 men hate fuckin' with them.

Now don't let her call an otherwise heterosexual male a fag who just might be questioning himself regarding whether he wants to be bothered in ANY type of way with women...predomiately Black women!

Anywho...

There's a huge shortage of MATURE Black males in general who stand for something other than the typical shit we see most in The Gay World.

My advice to you is to stick to your guns and don't waste NO more time and energy on these niggahz who aren't on the same page that YOU are with regards to partnering and relationships.

These niggahz and bitches are so morally bankrupt these days, they're known for bringing whole nations of people to their knees with all sorts of poverty!

I don't want to come across as being bitter. I certainly have SOME reasons to be bitter, but I'm not. I'm just tired of lies and bullshit and these lies and bullshit being perpetuated and generations of Black males are becoming more and more torn to shreds.

As for the over complimenting you on your looks, believe it or not, I've been there where you're coming from.

I TOO was once massively overweight, had acne issues and even felt very awkward around a lot of people. I worked at it and got the weight off, the acne cleared up and then became a social butterfly, but had then developed a lot of haters. Those haters were people I would've never suspected to hate on me.

I'm FAR from the ugly fat troll ya gurl lovepeacesoul1 or Ms. Frank`eisha Hughes (leynnysvibe on YouTube) would suggest. She's that drunk nappy headed bitch with the horrible saddle bags under her slanted eyes, rotting teeth on her upper left side of her bloating face most likely due to some prescription steroid usage.

But I digress...

I don't know any other way to say this to you, but don't get so caught up and worried about what it is that has grandpa Negro on neglect mode. The way she's treating you is pretty much what she feels about herself for any number of reasons you just aint found out yet.

I can think of a number of reasons why Grandma is trippin'! Leave the bitch in the convalescent home where you found her and let the nurses take care of her!

I think I'm just too nice. If I was a thug, spending his money, treating him like shit, playing games, fucking all his homeboys, he would LOVE me. But since I'm pretty much an average Joe, maybe he doesn't feel passionate about me??

I feel like he just might be either scared to get fully involved or wants just physical contact. Meet up, fuck, cuddle/pillow talk in between sessions, hang out for a bit and do it all over again.

But also I don't feel that way, cause he is very sensitive to my needs and seems attentive and like he really wants to make me happy. This whole situation is afucking mess and I Feel like a little bitch.

 
Post Posted: 2018-03-13 19:09:13  
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2018-03-13 16:37:08

Very interesting. You got all pissy and childish with me about a misunderstanding, but you put my ass on block!

If you're down for "listening" to me, I'll start off by saying that you ARE extremely attractive physically.

Your work ethic and moral compass seems to far exceed expectations of the average Negro Male well over age 50, so in a manner of speaking, you're a bit too mature ( in some ways ) than most.

I'll assume that this old niggah you've allowed yourself to get SPRUNG on is at least a fairly attractive looking old niggah!

The only person being playing is YOU playing yourself. That isn't to throw shade your way. This is constructive criticism that you NEED by old niggahz who can school you the right way.


This old niggah you messin' with is insecure about what it is that both of you supposedly have with one another. He's already let you know that as far as getting serious with you for some long haul shit, you're not the one and it aint TOTALLY on YOU.

He's OLD. You have MANY years ahead of you before YOU get OLD and have very limited resources for a good lover...especially if you don't ever develop into a good lover ( sexually and NONE Sexually ).

I don't know whether or not you've ever been molested at some point in your short life where you get all pissy about somebody you don't know paying you a compliment that often goes very sexual. You may NOT have been around very many Black and Latino men to know that we often do this and it doesn't always mean that we're trying to get up in them draws!

Unlike me, the average male lies 65% of the time about his sexual desires and extra curricular activities! So when I tell you something sexual, there's only about a 5% chance of SOME untruth I, personally speaking will say!

Getting back to your old nigger long distance lover: He's an old niggah who's keeping his limits options open mostly because much like ME, he's already seen something in your personality that dictates that you're FAR from ready to be in a relationship with an old niggah!

From everything that I've learned about you in the very brief amount of time you and I personally communicated, you have a whole lot of your shit together. The experience in dealing with people on some levels and how you process and deal with matters most likely is the main issue scaring the old man off!

He just may be one of the millions of nigger men who can't verbally communicate effectively and maturely... but wanna have bitch festivals and pity parties with other dumb faggy niggahz and never take ownership of their shit.

I can tell how you've dealt with ME personally via TEXT messaging/SnapChat/BGC Live private messaging that YOU haven't learned more mature ways in dealing with other dudes when there's a little rift or miscommunication.

Given the selection of people who scour and participate on social media...especially this site, I can pretty much see how you'd be how you are. I'm not saying that you're such this God Awful person neither. You certainly are NOT a horrible human being. That spot is reserved for the likes of bird-fu. lovepeacesoul1 and lose-ya-breath!

But ANYWAYS....

To keep putting shit blunt to you, you need to cut your loses with gramps and keep it moving on to someone who can emotionally and physically meet the demands and or needs you have. And stop getting pissy about someone with a healthy and strong sexual appetite letting your know that you look good enough eat up. Men DO that.

When the shit gets too uncomfortable for you to bare hearing, tell his ass to back up from the compliments. If they don't stop, then YOU stop fuckin' with him. Again, you're sexy as fuckin hell and dudes are going to wanna compliment you based upon their own amazement that you even give them the time of day!

No need to be a bitch about it.

To sum this all up, based on what you've stated, YOU'RE not the one for him and YOU need to get over it! He's actually doing YOU a favor by trying to treat you like a fuck toy. Accept that title from him and move on to another land where there IS no such title in existence.

2018-03-13 18:25:15

Well, I appreciate you giving it to me raw and uncut.


To answer your questions, no I\'ve never been molested. But I think the thing that irks me about gay men is the constant obsession with the physical. The obsession over how people look and dress, rather than other qualities that make solidify their potential as long term lovers.

How many cute boys have you met who had horrible personalities, nothing to say, full of games, drama, etc. Probably 8 out of 10. How many gay boys do you know that are keeping up with the Jonses\'s, jetting around the world to pride events, stay in the clubs with a body of Adonis sleeping on somebody\'s floor? Probably 9 out of 10.

I appreciate him telling me about how I look. I used to have a big weight/acne problem back in the day, so its nice to see that I\'ve gotten over that and flourished. But honestly after a while it gets tiring. I could be like \"It\'s snowing outside!\" and he\'ll go \"I wanna come lick some snow out of your ass.\" It gets old. I admit, i\'m sexually attracted to him , but I think i\'ve been able to see beyond the physical. Why can\'t he do the same?

Overall, I\'m just worried that he\'s in LUST and he\'s confusing those feelings for really feeling me. We know how that goes.

2018-03-13 18:50:39

His old ass is still battling whatever midlife crisis he's been in for over 10 years. He's not a good candidate for a bonafide suitable mate. He's Old and Broken!

The whole "Gay" lifestyle is exactly what white privileged homosexuals have made it to be wielding yet a little bit of that white supremacy tactics for the colored homos.

Anyways... this hyper sexualized society of faggots don't really have anything else to more proudly reach for because of how the littlest of things mired in love and more appropriate affection is more often demonized by the very same people who demonize homosexuality!

If that makes any sense, let me say this: Doing something nice for someone of the same sex that's known for going a little bit further for someone of the opposite sex.

Black females are REALLY big on noticing shit like that and will make even str8 men hate fuckin' with them.

Now don't let her call an otherwise heterosexual male a fag who just might be questioning himself regarding whether he wants to be bothered in ANY type of way with women...predomiately Black women!

Anywho...

There's a huge shortage of MATURE Black males in general who stand for something other than the typical shit we see most in The Gay World.

My advice to you is to stick to your guns and don't waste NO more time and energy on these niggahz who aren't on the same page that YOU are with regards to partnering and relationships.

These niggahz and bitches are so morally bankrupt these days, they're known for bringing whole nations of people to their knees with all sorts of poverty!

I don't want to come across as being bitter. I certainly have SOME reasons to be bitter, but I'm not. I'm just tired of lies and bullshit and these lies and bullshit being perpetuated and generations of Black males are becoming more and more torn to shreds.

As for the over complimenting you on your looks, believe it or not, I've been there where you're coming from.

I TOO was once massively overweight, had acne issues and even felt very awkward around a lot of people. I worked at it and got the weight off, the acne cleared up and then became a social butterfly, but had then developed a lot of haters. Those haters were people I would've never suspected to hate on me.

I'm FAR from the ugly fat troll ya gurl lovepeacesoul1 or Ms. Frank`eisha Hughes (leynnysvibe on YouTube) would suggest. She's that drunk nappy headed bitch with the horrible saddle bags under her slanted eyes, rotting teeth on her upper left side of her bloating face most likely due to some prescription steroid usage.

But I digress...

I don't know any other way to say this to you, but don't get so caught up and worried about what it is that has grandpa Negro on neglect mode. The way she's treating you is pretty much what she feels about herself for any number of reasons you just aint found out yet.

I can think of a number of reasons why Grandma is trippin'! Leave the bitch in the convalescent home where you found her and let the nurses take care of her!

2018-03-13 18:56:36

I think I'm just too nice. If I was a thug, spending his money, treating him like shit, playing games, fucking all his homeboys, he would LOVE me. But since I'm pretty much an average Joe, maybe he doesn't feel passionate about me??

I feel like he just might be either scared to get fully involved or wants just physical contact. Meet up, fuck, cuddle/pillow talk in between sessions, hang out for a bit and do it all over again.

But also I don't feel that way, cause he is very sensitive to my needs and seems attentive and like he really wants to make me happy. This whole situation is afucking mess and I Feel like a little bitch.

Yikes!!! You feel like a WHAT??? Niggah, we REALLY need to talk!

You might be feeling like a little bitch, but you're giving him all of the ammunition to make you feel like that.

How?

For starters, locate your self esteem!

Your looks and accomplishments at your age far exceeds a great many even at HIS age! You keep getting told how attractive you are for one, you truly ARE very attractive!

(2) Two, there's nigghaz telling you that because it often reflects that THEY don't feel nearly as attractive as they find YOU!

(3) Three, they can always sense that you don't feel the highest of regards about yourself and use THAT to manipulate you into a subservient sort of place emotionally and you spending many coins to show them that you care.

This niggah knows what you want and knows that you're serious. He doesn't want it from you because HE either doesn't feel deserving of the love you bring to the table or he may have seen something you've done to make him think or feel that you're not the best candidate for him to get serious about.

I understand the not feeling adequate enough and needing the reassurance of being truly loved for things other than physical and material.

He doesn't know it yet and hasn't learned how to express himself better using honesty.

Stop spending ya cash money to run up seeing his ass! Save all of them coins for a real man with whom you can take a trip outside of the continental US for a weekend and actually share real love!
 
Post Posted: 2018-03-13 19:09:32  
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2018-03-13 16:37:08

2018-03-13 18:52:43

*sighs*
 
Post Posted: 2018-03-13 19:10:56  
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2018-03-13 16:37:08

Very interesting. You got all pissy and childish with me about a misunderstanding, but you put my ass on block!

If you're down for "listening" to me, I'll start off by saying that you ARE extremely attractive physically.

Your work ethic and moral compass seems to far exceed expectations of the average Negro Male well over age 50, so in a manner of speaking, you're a bit too mature ( in some ways ) than most.

I'll assume that this old niggah you've allowed yourself to get SPRUNG on is at least a fairly attractive looking old niggah!

The only person being playing is YOU playing yourself. That isn't to throw shade your way. This is constructive criticism that you NEED by old niggahz who can school you the right way.


This old niggah you messin' with is insecure about what it is that both of you supposedly have with one another. He's already let you know that as far as getting serious with you for some long haul shit, you're not the one and it aint TOTALLY on YOU.

He's OLD. You have MANY years ahead of you before YOU get OLD and have very limited resources for a good lover...especially if you don't ever develop into a good lover ( sexually and NONE Sexually ).

I don't know whether or not you've ever been molested at some point in your short life where you get all pissy about somebody you don't know paying you a compliment that often goes very sexual. You may NOT have been around very many Black and Latino men to know that we often do this and it doesn't always mean that we're trying to get up in them draws!

Unlike me, the average male lies 65% of the time about his sexual desires and extra curricular activities! So when I tell you something sexual, there's only about a 5% chance of SOME untruth I, personally speaking will say!

Getting back to your old nigger long distance lover: He's an old niggah who's keeping his limits options open mostly because much like ME, he's already seen something in your personality that dictates that you're FAR from ready to be in a relationship with an old niggah!

From everything that I've learned about you in the very brief amount of time you and I personally communicated, you have a whole lot of your shit together. The experience in dealing with people on some levels and how you process and deal with matters most likely is the main issue scaring the old man off!

He just may be one of the millions of nigger men who can't verbally communicate effectively and maturely... but wanna have bitch festivals and pity parties with other dumb faggy niggahz and never take ownership of their shit.

I can tell how you've dealt with ME personally via TEXT messaging/SnapChat/BGC Live private messaging that YOU haven't learned more mature ways in dealing with other dudes when there's a little rift or miscommunication.

Given the selection of people who scour and participate on social media...especially this site, I can pretty much see how you'd be how you are. I'm not saying that you're such this God Awful person neither. You certainly are NOT a horrible human being. That spot is reserved for the likes of bird-fu. lovepeacesoul1 and lose-ya-breath!

But ANYWAYS....

To keep putting shit blunt to you, you need to cut your loses with gramps and keep it moving on to someone who can emotionally and physically meet the demands and or needs you have. And stop getting pissy about someone with a healthy and strong sexual appetite letting your know that you look good enough eat up. Men DO that.

When the shit gets too uncomfortable for you to bare hearing, tell his ass to back up from the compliments. If they don't stop, then YOU stop fuckin' with him. Again, you're sexy as fuckin hell and dudes are going to wanna compliment you based upon their own amazement that you even give them the time of day!

No need to be a bitch about it.

To sum this all up, based on what you've stated, YOU'RE not the one for him and YOU need to get over it! He's actually doing YOU a favor by trying to treat you like a fuck toy. Accept that title from him and move on to another land where there IS no such title in existence.

2018-03-13 18:25:15

Well, I appreciate you giving it to me raw and uncut.


To answer your questions, no I\'ve never been molested. But I think the thing that irks me about gay men is the constant obsession with the physical. The obsession over how people look and dress, rather than other qualities that make solidify their potential as long term lovers.

How many cute boys have you met who had horrible personalities, nothing to say, full of games, drama, etc. Probably 8 out of 10. How many gay boys do you know that are keeping up with the Jonses\'s, jetting around the world to pride events, stay in the clubs with a body of Adonis sleeping on somebody\'s floor? Probably 9 out of 10.

I appreciate him telling me about how I look. I used to have a big weight/acne problem back in the day, so its nice to see that I\'ve gotten over that and flourished. But honestly after a while it gets tiring. I could be like \"It\'s snowing outside!\" and he\'ll go \"I wanna come lick some snow out of your ass.\" It gets old. I admit, i\'m sexually attracted to him , but I think i\'ve been able to see beyond the physical. Why can\'t he do the same?

Overall, I\'m just worried that he\'s in LUST and he\'s confusing those feelings for really feeling me. We know how that goes.

2018-03-13 18:50:39

His old ass is still battling whatever midlife crisis he's been in for over 10 years. He's not a good candidate for a bonafide suitable mate. He's Old and Broken!

The whole "Gay" lifestyle is exactly what white privileged homosexuals have made it to be wielding yet a little bit of that white supremacy tactics for the colored homos.

Anyways... this hyper sexualized society of faggots don't really have anything else to more proudly reach for because of how the littlest of things mired in love and more appropriate affection is more often demonized by the very same people who demonize homosexuality!

If that makes any sense, let me say this: Doing something nice for someone of the same sex that's known for going a little bit further for someone of the opposite sex.

Black females are REALLY big on noticing shit like that and will make even str8 men hate fuckin' with them.

Now don't let her call an otherwise heterosexual male a fag who just might be questioning himself regarding whether he wants to be bothered in ANY type of way with women...predomiately Black women!

Anywho...

There's a huge shortage of MATURE Black males in general who stand for something other than the typical shit we see most in The Gay World.

My advice to you is to stick to your guns and don't waste NO more time and energy on these niggahz who aren't on the same page that YOU are with regards to partnering and relationships.

These niggahz and bitches are so morally bankrupt these days, they're known for bringing whole nations of people to their knees with all sorts of poverty!

I don't want to come across as being bitter. I certainly have SOME reasons to be bitter, but I'm not. I'm just tired of lies and bullshit and these lies and bullshit being perpetuated and generations of Black males are becoming more and more torn to shreds.

As for the over complimenting you on your looks, believe it or not, I've been there where you're coming from.

I TOO was once massively overweight, had acne issues and even felt very awkward around a lot of people. I worked at it and got the weight off, the acne cleared up and then became a social butterfly, but had then developed a lot of haters. Those haters were people I would've never suspected to hate on me.

I'm FAR from the ugly fat troll ya gurl lovepeacesoul1 or Ms. Frank`eisha Hughes (leynnysvibe on YouTube) would suggest. She's that drunk nappy headed bitch with the horrible saddle bags under her slanted eyes, rotting teeth on her upper left side of her bloating face most likely due to some prescription steroid usage.

But I digress...

I don't know any other way to say this to you, but don't get so caught up and worried about what it is that has grandpa Negro on neglect mode. The way she's treating you is pretty much what she feels about herself for any number of reasons you just aint found out yet.

I can think of a number of reasons why Grandma is trippin'! Leave the bitch in the convalescent home where you found her and let the nurses take care of her!

2018-03-13 18:56:36

I think I'm just too nice. If I was a thug, spending his money, treating him like shit, playing games, fucking all his homeboys, he would LOVE me. But since I'm pretty much an average Joe, maybe he doesn't feel passionate about me??

I feel like he just might be either scared to get fully involved or wants just physical contact. Meet up, fuck, cuddle/pillow talk in between sessions, hang out for a bit and do it all over again.

But also I don't feel that way, cause he is very sensitive to my needs and seems attentive and like he really wants to make me happy. This whole situation is afucking mess and I Feel like a little bitch.

2018-03-13 19:09:13

Yikes!!! You feel like a WHAT??? Niggah, we REALLY need to talk!

You might be feeling like a little bitch, but you're giving him all of the ammunition to make you feel like that.

How?

For starters, locate your self esteem!

Your looks and accomplishments at your age far exceeds a great many even at HIS age! You keep getting told how attractive you are for one, you truly ARE very attractive!

(2) Two, there's nigghaz telling you that because it often reflects that THEY don't feel nearly as attractive as they find YOU!

(3) Three, they can always sense that you don't feel the highest of regards about yourself and use THAT to manipulate you into a subservient sort of place emotionally and you spending many coins to show them that you care.

This niggah knows what you want and knows that you're serious. He doesn't want it from you because HE either doesn't feel deserving of the love you bring to the table or he may have seen something you've done to make him think or feel that you're not the best candidate for him to get serious about.

I understand the not feeling adequate enough and needing the reassurance of being truly loved for things other than physical and material.

He doesn't know it yet and hasn't learned how to express himself better using honesty.

Stop spending ya cash money to run up seeing his ass! Save all of them coins for a real man with whom you can take a trip outside of the continental US for a weekend and actually share real love!

You're right. He doesnt want me like that. I See it now.
 
Post Posted: 2018-03-13 19:11:44  
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2018-03-13 16:37:08

Alright, so here’s the thing. I’ve been talking to this for about 3 months now. It’s long distance (about 800 miles 2 hr flight) and there’s a 24 year age gap. There isn’t a sugar daddy thing, or anything like that. I’ve never taken money from him or asked him to buy me things and don’t plan on doing it. We’ve had a few head butts here and there but nothing too serious. I did distance myself from him for about 3 weeks after a small fight we had about him being somewhat of a high-maintenance diva at times and coldhearted, but we’ve recently made up and things have been fine ever since. This past weekend I called him out on something. Basically, every chance he gets he turns a conversation sexual. He’s always complimenting my body, how I look, my ass etc. I know I look good, but I’m not shallow. I don’t get open off complements. I rather him said other things about my personality, how he loves talking to me, how I make him feel, etc. Anyway, after I said something about it he apologized and said he would stop it. I apologized for being oversensitive cause I know I’m no Virgin Mary, but it had me thinking. Basically this is what happened (Actual texts):

Note: The **’s aren’t what was said, just what I picked up from the what he told me.

Me: I guess I was just feeling some type of way cause I still don’t know how you feel about me.

Him: No worries, just know you’re a very sexy man. ** Translation: You make my dick hard, but that’s about it. OR I feel strongly about you and don\\\'t want to scare you away**

Me: That’s it? What do you feel towards me other than that?

(No replies yet)

I doubled texts like a bitch, but whatever: I don’t want to assume or jump to conclusions so could you tell me please? Once again, trying to get clarity on the situation

Him: Sorry for the late response, I was on the phone. I think you’re an amazing guy, very thoughtful, compassionate, a lot of curiosities and interest. Translation: You have good qualities, or I’ve probably told 100s of guys this.

Me: How do I make you feel? Do you see this going anywhere, do you want to be with me or you don’t know? You won’t hurt my feelings.

Him: I know the gay life is something new for you which can be scary which is totally understandable. You want to be loved and respected. And you want honesty. Translation: Once again, I’m going to supercoat it and dance around the question OR I know how you feel, I\\\'ve been there before.

Him: Where is this coming from?

Me: I just like having clarity. I don’t mean to come off as I’m pressuring you. We’ve been talking a while and time and energy is being invested

Him: You make me feel good, excited, nervous, angry, and frustrated. You make me thinking about what I’m saying or not saying.

Him: I enjoy talking to you and seeing your face.

Him: I enjoy talking about the future and really think and believe there could be a future.

Him: You make me feel young , but remind me that I’m older, and I have more life experience.

Him: I’m excited about getting to know you more, but afraid of getting closer. Translation: Either I’ve been hurt in the past or I’m giving you an excuse for wasting your time

Me: Why?

Him: I’m afraid of losing you to the military, or the gay life style. **Translation: You’re attractive and I know you have access to better guys than me or I\\\'m giving you an excuse, or I'm geuinely afraid**

Me: I don’t care about the gay lifestyle, and have no interest in it. It’s vain, superficial and full of promiscuous men looking for their next fix. Basically, I’m asking you this because…I want you to be my boyfriend.** Me being completely honest about how I feel, I’m a one man’s man. Once we’re together, it’s just us.**

Him: You’re sweet, but we should work on seeing each other a little more and getting to know each other better. I’m not going anywhere. Translation: I want to have my cake and eat it, too. I want to continue meeting up with you, accessing your body, hanging out with no strings. If something better comes along or I get bored, I can break away with a clear conscious. Or I wanna take things slow and get to know you better.

Me: Thank you for being honest.

Him: No problem. Are you OK?

Me: Yes.

Him: Ok, sleep well. Talk tomorrow.

Now I was feeling stupid all Monday, so I texted him and basically told him I wouldn’t be coming to visit him for my birthday next month. He was upset and outraged and cursed me out and said he knew I was gonna disappear and run from him, etc. He said guys are always coming to his life and leaving. After that he asked if I was ok and apologized and said he does care about me, etc. After I calmed down, I told him i’m still coming and that hopefully we can move on from this. We’ve been doing ok. Here’s my question

Bros, am I being played? I’m afraid I’m being strung along. I feel like I’m just this boy-toy that he wants to meet up with every so often, roll around in the sack, get his rocks off and find me again when he wants another round. He can talk so vividly about sex, what he wants to do to my body, but when I bring up the subject of us I get vague answers or just “Let’s see what happens”. I also don’t feel that way cause we talk daily, he’s always talking about future plans that involve us and is constantly reminding me of my passport cause he wants to take trips abroad with me. I can’t shake this feeling that he doesn’t like me in that same way I do or that I’m just a placeholder until another cute piece of ass comes along. He\\\'s older and we know how the gay community treats guys in their 50s. Does he not take me seriously cause of my age, or is he so jaded from being older and can't make meaningful connections anymore? I do have a habit of overreacting and jumping to conclusions, but I think because emotions are involved I can’t see straight. Can someone please give me some non-biased, non-BS non-PC advice? I need help. I’m man enough to admit I do like him and whenever I think about him my heart races, but also strong enough to walk away if the feeling isnt mutual. I’m not looking to get married or go get matching neck tattoos, but I would at least like to know if this is going somewhere and not wasting my time. Those weekend flights and airport parking ain’t cheap.

Tl;dr Am I Being played?

Grammar might be shitty, i typed this is a flurry.

2018-03-13 18:39:06



So the question you will have to ask yourself:

1. Do I like this dude - if yes, then hang in there, and let it work itself out. Every new and even old relationships have kinks and every relationship starts with an attraction, then with sex and then everything else falls into place.

If you don`t want to hang in there and/or have more unanswered question than answered, then let it go, but by doing that you could be missing out on a good man or you may save yourself from getting hurt and disappointed.

2. You cannot and should not ask a man how he feels about you. Some men can show a person better than they can tell a person how they feel. He could be scared, unsure, confused and probably doesn`t know how you really feel or if you are going to stay around. I mean you make your mouth say anything, just like he can - but the end result is there is always one person in the relationship that is more involved than the other - that`s just a given. You may be more advanced in what you want than he is.

3. Also you cannot ask this man questions about what he feels and then when he responds, you counter his response with a negative or translation that you are feeling. It pretty much defeats the purpose of asking him if you already have your own answer.

4. I think you have too many hangups and expectations that are striking more fear in him....I also think you play mind games in order for him to express how he feels, in the case of you saying you where not going to visit him to get a reaction and then turned around and said you would go visit made him react, but you wouldn`t want to make a habit of doing that because it would be expected and when it doesn`t turn out like it did the first few times, then you will be very disappointed.

At this point, I think you should do some deep soul searching and weight the pro`s and con`s of this relationship...and if you have more con`s than pro`s, you need to let it go.

2018-03-13 18:49:14

I wasnt playing mind games when I said I wasnt coming, I genuinely felt that way and was on the phone with DELTA cancelling my ticket.

I'm feeling some typa way because he isn't being forthright with how he feels about how from a non-sexual standpoint. He can type paragraphs about eating ass and sucking my toes, but can't give me any type of expression when it comes to what he's looking for.

Do you expect a leasing company to rent to you without signing a contract? Do you invest your savings in a depreciating asset? It's the same thing.


You are right about some times, though. I can't read his mind and i'm not trying to. I'll take approach this with some caution, but I'll definitively be mindful of my emotional investments.

I can`t see any progress in this relationship because there are too many issues that you feel are bothering you. You don`t seem to be happy and so your unhappiness sets the tone for the relationship and his not meeting your needs also sets the tone for the relationship. I can`t see a happy medium anywhere. More than likely you will just have to stay in it until it fizzles out.
 
Post Posted: 2018-03-13 19:14:22  
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2018-03-13 16:37:08

Very interesting. You got all pissy and childish with me about a misunderstanding, but you put my ass on block!

If you're down for "listening" to me, I'll start off by saying that you ARE extremely attractive physically.

Your work ethic and moral compass seems to far exceed expectations of the average Negro Male well over age 50, so in a manner of speaking, you're a bit too mature ( in some ways ) than most.

I'll assume that this old niggah you've allowed yourself to get SPRUNG on is at least a fairly attractive looking old niggah!

The only person being playing is YOU playing yourself. That isn't to throw shade your way. This is constructive criticism that you NEED by old niggahz who can school you the right way.


This old niggah you messin' with is insecure about what it is that both of you supposedly have with one another. He's already let you know that as far as getting serious with you for some long haul shit, you're not the one and it aint TOTALLY on YOU.

He's OLD. You have MANY years ahead of you before YOU get OLD and have very limited resources for a good lover...especially if you don't ever develop into a good lover ( sexually and NONE Sexually ).

I don't know whether or not you've ever been molested at some point in your short life where you get all pissy about somebody you don't know paying you a compliment that often goes very sexual. You may NOT have been around very many Black and Latino men to know that we often do this and it doesn't always mean that we're trying to get up in them draws!

Unlike me, the average male lies 65% of the time about his sexual desires and extra curricular activities! So when I tell you something sexual, there's only about a 5% chance of SOME untruth I, personally speaking will say!

Getting back to your old nigger long distance lover: He's an old niggah who's keeping his limits options open mostly because much like ME, he's already seen something in your personality that dictates that you're FAR from ready to be in a relationship with an old niggah!

From everything that I've learned about you in the very brief amount of time you and I personally communicated, you have a whole lot of your shit together. The experience in dealing with people on some levels and how you process and deal with matters most likely is the main issue scaring the old man off!

He just may be one of the millions of nigger men who can't verbally communicate effectively and maturely... but wanna have bitch festivals and pity parties with other dumb faggy niggahz and never take ownership of their shit.

I can tell how you've dealt with ME personally via TEXT messaging/SnapChat/BGC Live private messaging that YOU haven't learned more mature ways in dealing with other dudes when there's a little rift or miscommunication.

Given the selection of people who scour and participate on social media...especially this site, I can pretty much see how you'd be how you are. I'm not saying that you're such this God Awful person neither. You certainly are NOT a horrible human being. That spot is reserved for the likes of bird-fu. lovepeacesoul1 and lose-ya-breath!

But ANYWAYS....

To keep putting shit blunt to you, you need to cut your loses with gramps and keep it moving on to someone who can emotionally and physically meet the demands and or needs you have. And stop getting pissy about someone with a healthy and strong sexual appetite letting your know that you look good enough eat up. Men DO that.

When the shit gets too uncomfortable for you to bare hearing, tell his ass to back up from the compliments. If they don't stop, then YOU stop fuckin' with him. Again, you're sexy as fuckin hell and dudes are going to wanna compliment you based upon their own amazement that you even give them the time of day!

No need to be a bitch about it.

To sum this all up, based on what you've stated, YOU'RE not the one for him and YOU need to get over it! He's actually doing YOU a favor by trying to treat you like a fuck toy. Accept that title from him and move on to another land where there IS no such title in existence.

2018-03-13 18:25:15

Well, I appreciate you giving it to me raw and uncut.


To answer your questions, no I\'ve never been molested. But I think the thing that irks me about gay men is the constant obsession with the physical. The obsession over how people look and dress, rather than other qualities that make solidify their potential as long term lovers.

How many cute boys have you met who had horrible personalities, nothing to say, full of games, drama, etc. Probably 8 out of 10. How many gay boys do you know that are keeping up with the Jonses\'s, jetting around the world to pride events, stay in the clubs with a body of Adonis sleeping on somebody\'s floor? Probably 9 out of 10.

I appreciate him telling me about how I look. I used to have a big weight/acne problem back in the day, so its nice to see that I\'ve gotten over that and flourished. But honestly after a while it gets tiring. I could be like \"It\'s snowing outside!\" and he\'ll go \"I wanna come lick some snow out of your ass.\" It gets old. I admit, i\'m sexually attracted to him , but I think i\'ve been able to see beyond the physical. Why can\'t he do the same?

Overall, I\'m just worried that he\'s in LUST and he\'s confusing those feelings for really feeling me. We know how that goes.

2018-03-13 18:50:39

His old ass is still battling whatever midlife crisis he's been in for over 10 years. He's not a good candidate for a bonafide suitable mate. He's Old and Broken!

The whole "Gay" lifestyle is exactly what white privileged homosexuals have made it to be wielding yet a little bit of that white supremacy tactics for the colored homos.

Anyways... this hyper sexualized society of faggots don't really have anything else to more proudly reach for because of how the littlest of things mired in love and more appropriate affection is more often demonized by the very same people who demonize homosexuality!

If that makes any sense, let me say this: Doing something nice for someone of the same sex that's known for going a little bit further for someone of the opposite sex.

Black females are REALLY big on noticing shit like that and will make even str8 men hate fuckin' with them.

Now don't let her call an otherwise heterosexual male a fag who just might be questioning himself regarding whether he wants to be bothered in ANY type of way with women...predomiately Black women!

Anywho...

There's a huge shortage of MATURE Black males in general who stand for something other than the typical shit we see most in The Gay World.

My advice to you is to stick to your guns and don't waste NO more time and energy on these niggahz who aren't on the same page that YOU are with regards to partnering and relationships.

These niggahz and bitches are so morally bankrupt these days, they're known for bringing whole nations of people to their knees with all sorts of poverty!

I don't want to come across as being bitter. I certainly have SOME reasons to be bitter, but I'm not. I'm just tired of lies and bullshit and these lies and bullshit being perpetuated and generations of Black males are becoming more and more torn to shreds.

As for the over complimenting you on your looks, believe it or not, I've been there where you're coming from.

I TOO was once massively overweight, had acne issues and even felt very awkward around a lot of people. I worked at it and got the weight off, the acne cleared up and then became a social butterfly, but had then developed a lot of haters. Those haters were people I would've never suspected to hate on me.

I'm FAR from the ugly fat troll ya gurl lovepeacesoul1 or Ms. Frank`eisha Hughes (leynnysvibe on YouTube) would suggest. She's that drunk nappy headed bitch with the horrible saddle bags under her slanted eyes, rotting teeth on her upper left side of her bloating face most likely due to some prescription steroid usage.

But I digress...

I don't know any other way to say this to you, but don't get so caught up and worried about what it is that has grandpa Negro on neglect mode. The way she's treating you is pretty much what she feels about herself for any number of reasons you just aint found out yet.

I can think of a number of reasons why Grandma is trippin'! Leave the bitch in the convalescent home where you found her and let the nurses take care of her!

2018-03-13 18:56:36

I think I'm just too nice. If I was a thug, spending his money, treating him like shit, playing games, fucking all his homeboys, he would LOVE me. But since I'm pretty much an average Joe, maybe he doesn't feel passionate about me??

I feel like he just might be either scared to get fully involved or wants just physical contact. Meet up, fuck, cuddle/pillow talk in between sessions, hang out for a bit and do it all over again.

But also I don't feel that way, cause he is very sensitive to my needs and seems attentive and like he really wants to make me happy. This whole situation is afucking mess and I Feel like a little bitch.

2018-03-13 19:09:13

Yikes!!! You feel like a WHAT??? Niggah, we REALLY need to talk!

You might be feeling like a little bitch, but you're giving him all of the ammunition to make you feel like that.

How?

For starters, locate your self esteem!

Your looks and accomplishments at your age far exceeds a great many even at HIS age! You keep getting told how attractive you are for one, you truly ARE very attractive!

(2) Two, there's nigghaz telling you that because it often reflects that THEY don't feel nearly as attractive as they find YOU!

(3) Three, they can always sense that you don't feel the highest of regards about yourself and use THAT to manipulate you into a subservient sort of place emotionally and you spending many coins to show them that you care.

This niggah knows what you want and knows that you're serious. He doesn't want it from you because HE either doesn't feel deserving of the love you bring to the table or he may have seen something you've done to make him think or feel that you're not the best candidate for him to get serious about.

I understand the not feeling adequate enough and needing the reassurance of being truly loved for things other than physical and material.

He doesn't know it yet and hasn't learned how to express himself better using honesty.

Stop spending ya cash money to run up seeing his ass! Save all of them coins for a real man with whom you can take a trip outside of the continental US for a weekend and actually share real love!

2018-03-13 19:10:56

You're right. He doesnt want me like that. I See it now.

I can honestly say I don't have self esteem or confidence issues at all. I've accepted all my insecurities and feel good about myself. I'm just not trying to be someone's boytoy.
 
Post Posted: 2018-03-13 19:18:04  
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2018-03-13 16:37:08

Alright, so here’s the thing. I’ve been talking to this for about 3 months now. It’s long distance (about 800 miles 2 hr flight) and there’s a 24 year age gap. There isn’t a sugar daddy thing, or anything like that. I’ve never taken money from him or asked him to buy me things and don’t plan on doing it. We’ve had a few head butts here and there but nothing too serious. I did distance myself from him for about 3 weeks after a small fight we had about him being somewhat of a high-maintenance diva at times and coldhearted, but we’ve recently made up and things have been fine ever since. This past weekend I called him out on something. Basically, every chance he gets he turns a conversation sexual. He’s always complimenting my body, how I look, my ass etc. I know I look good, but I’m not shallow. I don’t get open off complements. I rather him said other things about my personality, how he loves talking to me, how I make him feel, etc. Anyway, after I said something about it he apologized and said he would stop it. I apologized for being oversensitive cause I know I’m no Virgin Mary, but it had me thinking. Basically this is what happened (Actual texts):

Note: The **’s aren’t what was said, just what I picked up from the what he told me.

Me: I guess I was just feeling some type of way cause I still don’t know how you feel about me.

Him: No worries, just know you’re a very sexy man. ** Translation: You make my dick hard, but that’s about it. OR I feel strongly about you and don\\\'t want to scare you away**

Me: That’s it? What do you feel towards me other than that?

(No replies yet)

I doubled texts like a bitch, but whatever: I don’t want to assume or jump to conclusions so could you tell me please? Once again, trying to get clarity on the situation

Him: Sorry for the late response, I was on the phone. I think you’re an amazing guy, very thoughtful, compassionate, a lot of curiosities and interest. Translation: You have good qualities, or I’ve probably told 100s of guys this.

Me: How do I make you feel? Do you see this going anywhere, do you want to be with me or you don’t know? You won’t hurt my feelings.

Him: I know the gay life is something new for you which can be scary which is totally understandable. You want to be loved and respected. And you want honesty. Translation: Once again, I’m going to supercoat it and dance around the question OR I know how you feel, I\\\'ve been there before.

Him: Where is this coming from?

Me: I just like having clarity. I don’t mean to come off as I’m pressuring you. We’ve been talking a while and time and energy is being invested

Him: You make me feel good, excited, nervous, angry, and frustrated. You make me thinking about what I’m saying or not saying.

Him: I enjoy talking to you and seeing your face.

Him: I enjoy talking about the future and really think and believe there could be a future.

Him: You make me feel young , but remind me that I’m older, and I have more life experience.

Him: I’m excited about getting to know you more, but afraid of getting closer. Translation: Either I’ve been hurt in the past or I’m giving you an excuse for wasting your time

Me: Why?

Him: I’m afraid of losing you to the military, or the gay life style. **Translation: You’re attractive and I know you have access to better guys than me or I\\\'m giving you an excuse, or I'm geuinely afraid**

Me: I don’t care about the gay lifestyle, and have no interest in it. It’s vain, superficial and full of promiscuous men looking for their next fix. Basically, I’m asking you this because…I want you to be my boyfriend.** Me being completely honest about how I feel, I’m a one man’s man. Once we’re together, it’s just us.**

Him: You’re sweet, but we should work on seeing each other a little more and getting to know each other better. I’m not going anywhere. Translation: I want to have my cake and eat it, too. I want to continue meeting up with you, accessing your body, hanging out with no strings. If something better comes along or I get bored, I can break away with a clear conscious. Or I wanna take things slow and get to know you better.

Me: Thank you for being honest.

Him: No problem. Are you OK?

Me: Yes.

Him: Ok, sleep well. Talk tomorrow.

Now I was feeling stupid all Monday, so I texted him and basically told him I wouldn’t be coming to visit him for my birthday next month. He was upset and outraged and cursed me out and said he knew I was gonna disappear and run from him, etc. He said guys are always coming to his life and leaving. After that he asked if I was ok and apologized and said he does care about me, etc. After I calmed down, I told him i’m still coming and that hopefully we can move on from this. We’ve been doing ok. Here’s my question

Bros, am I being played? I’m afraid I’m being strung along. I feel like I’m just this boy-toy that he wants to meet up with every so often, roll around in the sack, get his rocks off and find me again when he wants another round. He can talk so vividly about sex, what he wants to do to my body, but when I bring up the subject of us I get vague answers or just “Let’s see what happens”. I also don’t feel that way cause we talk daily, he’s always talking about future plans that involve us and is constantly reminding me of my passport cause he wants to take trips abroad with me. I can’t shake this feeling that he doesn’t like me in that same way I do or that I’m just a placeholder until another cute piece of ass comes along. He\\\'s older and we know how the gay community treats guys in their 50s. Does he not take me seriously cause of my age, or is he so jaded from being older and can't make meaningful connections anymore? I do have a habit of overreacting and jumping to conclusions, but I think because emotions are involved I can’t see straight. Can someone please give me some non-biased, non-BS non-PC advice? I need help. I’m man enough to admit I do like him and whenever I think about him my heart races, but also strong enough to walk away if the feeling isnt mutual. I’m not looking to get married or go get matching neck tattoos, but I would at least like to know if this is going somewhere and not wasting my time. Those weekend flights and airport parking ain’t cheap.

Tl;dr Am I Being played?

Grammar might be shitty, i typed this is a flurry.

2018-03-13 18:39:06



So the question you will have to ask yourself:

1. Do I like this dude - if yes, then hang in there, and let it work itself out. Every new and even old relationships have kinks and every relationship starts with an attraction, then with sex and then everything else falls into place.

If you don`t want to hang in there and/or have more unanswered question than answered, then let it go, but by doing that you could be missing out on a good man or you may save yourself from getting hurt and disappointed.

2. You cannot and should not ask a man how he feels about you. Some men can show a person better than they can tell a person how they feel. He could be scared, unsure, confused and probably doesn`t know how you really feel or if you are going to stay around. I mean you make your mouth say anything, just like he can - but the end result is there is always one person in the relationship that is more involved than the other - that`s just a given. You may be more advanced in what you want than he is.

3. Also you cannot ask this man questions about what he feels and then when he responds, you counter his response with a negative or translation that you are feeling. It pretty much defeats the purpose of asking him if you already have your own answer.

4. I think you have too many hangups and expectations that are striking more fear in him....I also think you play mind games in order for him to express how he feels, in the case of you saying you where not going to visit him to get a reaction and then turned around and said you would go visit made him react, but you wouldn`t want to make a habit of doing that because it would be expected and when it doesn`t turn out like it did the first few times, then you will be very disappointed.

At this point, I think you should do some deep soul searching and weight the pro`s and con`s of this relationship...and if you have more con`s than pro`s, you need to let it go.

2018-03-13 18:49:14

I wasnt playing mind games when I said I wasnt coming, I genuinely felt that way and was on the phone with DELTA cancelling my ticket.

I'm feeling some typa way because he isn't being forthright with how he feels about how from a non-sexual standpoint. He can type paragraphs about eating ass and sucking my toes, but can't give me any type of expression when it comes to what he's looking for.

Do you expect a leasing company to rent to you without signing a contract? Do you invest your savings in a depreciating asset? It's the same thing.


You are right about some times, though. I can't read his mind and i'm not trying to. I'll take approach this with some caution, but I'll definitively be mindful of my emotional investments.

2018-03-13 19:11:44

I can`t see any progress in this relationship because there are too many issues that you feel are bothering you. You don`t seem to be happy and so your unhappiness sets the tone for the relationship and his not meeting your needs also sets the tone for the relationship. I can`t see a happy medium anywhere. More than likely you will just have to stay in it until it fizzles out.

I actually agree with this.

I guess all I can do is just keep doing me and be the best version of myself. If he ain't trying to lock me down or claim me, then I'll just move on. Maybe he'll realize its too late when i'm already gone.


I just hate how it takes people to leave to appreciate you. Why can't you see a good thing and say "Wow! This is mine! This guy is great, he cares about me and wants to make me happy! He has no ulterior motives, has his own shit, takes care of himself and has a good head on his shoulders! I need to snatch him up!"
 
Post Posted: 2018-03-13 19:22:55  
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2018-03-13 16:37:08

Very interesting. You got all pissy and childish with me about a misunderstanding, but you put my ass on block!

If you're down for "listening" to me, I'll start off by saying that you ARE extremely attractive physically.

Your work ethic and moral compass seems to far exceed expectations of the average Negro Male well over age 50, so in a manner of speaking, you're a bit too mature ( in some ways ) than most.

I'll assume that this old niggah you've allowed yourself to get SPRUNG on is at least a fairly attractive looking old niggah!

The only person being playing is YOU playing yourself. That isn't to throw shade your way. This is constructive criticism that you NEED by old niggahz who can school you the right way.


This old niggah you messin' with is insecure about what it is that both of you supposedly have with one another. He's already let you know that as far as getting serious with you for some long haul shit, you're not the one and it aint TOTALLY on YOU.

He's OLD. You have MANY years ahead of you before YOU get OLD and have very limited resources for a good lover...especially if you don't ever develop into a good lover ( sexually and NONE Sexually ).

I don't know whether or not you've ever been molested at some point in your short life where you get all pissy about somebody you don't know paying you a compliment that often goes very sexual. You may NOT have been around very many Black and Latino men to know that we often do this and it doesn't always mean that we're trying to get up in them draws!

Unlike me, the average male lies 65% of the time about his sexual desires and extra curricular activities! So when I tell you something sexual, there's only about a 5% chance of SOME untruth I, personally speaking will say!

Getting back to your old nigger long distance lover: He's an old niggah who's keeping his limits options open mostly because much like ME, he's already seen something in your personality that dictates that you're FAR from ready to be in a relationship with an old niggah!

From everything that I've learned about you in the very brief amount of time you and I personally communicated, you have a whole lot of your shit together. The experience in dealing with people on some levels and how you process and deal with matters most likely is the main issue scaring the old man off!

He just may be one of the millions of nigger men who can't verbally communicate effectively and maturely... but wanna have bitch festivals and pity parties with other dumb faggy niggahz and never take ownership of their shit.

I can tell how you've dealt with ME personally via TEXT messaging/SnapChat/BGC Live private messaging that YOU haven't learned more mature ways in dealing with other dudes when there's a little rift or miscommunication.

Given the selection of people who scour and participate on social media...especially this site, I can pretty much see how you'd be how you are. I'm not saying that you're such this God Awful person neither. You certainly are NOT a horrible human being. That spot is reserved for the likes of bird-fu. lovepeacesoul1 and lose-ya-breath!

But ANYWAYS....

To keep putting shit blunt to you, you need to cut your loses with gramps and keep it moving on to someone who can emotionally and physically meet the demands and or needs you have. And stop getting pissy about someone with a healthy and strong sexual appetite letting your know that you look good enough eat up. Men DO that.

When the shit gets too uncomfortable for you to bare hearing, tell his ass to back up from the compliments. If they don't stop, then YOU stop fuckin' with him. Again, you're sexy as fuckin hell and dudes are going to wanna compliment you based upon their own amazement that you even give them the time of day!

No need to be a bitch about it.

To sum this all up, based on what you've stated, YOU'RE not the one for him and YOU need to get over it! He's actually doing YOU a favor by trying to treat you like a fuck toy. Accept that title from him and move on to another land where there IS no such title in existence.

2018-03-13 18:25:15

Well, I appreciate you giving it to me raw and uncut.


To answer your questions, no I\'ve never been molested. But I think the thing that irks me about gay men is the constant obsession with the physical. The obsession over how people look and dress, rather than other qualities that make solidify their potential as long term lovers.

How many cute boys have you met who had horrible personalities, nothing to say, full of games, drama, etc. Probably 8 out of 10. How many gay boys do you know that are keeping up with the Jonses\'s, jetting around the world to pride events, stay in the clubs with a body of Adonis sleeping on somebody\'s floor? Probably 9 out of 10.

I appreciate him telling me about how I look. I used to have a big weight/acne problem back in the day, so its nice to see that I\'ve gotten over that and flourished. But honestly after a while it gets tiring. I could be like \"It\'s snowing outside!\" and he\'ll go \"I wanna come lick some snow out of your ass.\" It gets old. I admit, i\'m sexually attracted to him , but I think i\'ve been able to see beyond the physical. Why can\'t he do the same?

Overall, I\'m just worried that he\'s in LUST and he\'s confusing those feelings for really feeling me. We know how that goes.

2018-03-13 18:50:39

His old ass is still battling whatever midlife crisis he's been in for over 10 years. He's not a good candidate for a bonafide suitable mate. He's Old and Broken!

The whole "Gay" lifestyle is exactly what white privileged homosexuals have made it to be wielding yet a little bit of that white supremacy tactics for the colored homos.

Anyways... this hyper sexualized society of faggots don't really have anything else to more proudly reach for because of how the littlest of things mired in love and more appropriate affection is more often demonized by the very same people who demonize homosexuality!

If that makes any sense, let me say this: Doing something nice for someone of the same sex that's known for going a little bit further for someone of the opposite sex.

Black females are REALLY big on noticing shit like that and will make even str8 men hate fuckin' with them.

Now don't let her call an otherwise heterosexual male a fag who just might be questioning himself regarding whether he wants to be bothered in ANY type of way with women...predomiately Black women!

Anywho...

There's a huge shortage of MATURE Black males in general who stand for something other than the typical shit we see most in The Gay World.

My advice to you is to stick to your guns and don't waste NO more time and energy on these niggahz who aren't on the same page that YOU are with regards to partnering and relationships.

These niggahz and bitches are so morally bankrupt these days, they're known for bringing whole nations of people to their knees with all sorts of poverty!

I don't want to come across as being bitter. I certainly have SOME reasons to be bitter, but I'm not. I'm just tired of lies and bullshit and these lies and bullshit being perpetuated and generations of Black males are becoming more and more torn to shreds.

As for the over complimenting you on your looks, believe it or not, I've been there where you're coming from.

I TOO was once massively overweight, had acne issues and even felt very awkward around a lot of people. I worked at it and got the weight off, the acne cleared up and then became a social butterfly, but had then developed a lot of haters. Those haters were people I would've never suspected to hate on me.

I'm FAR from the ugly fat troll ya gurl lovepeacesoul1 or Ms. Frank`eisha Hughes (leynnysvibe on YouTube) would suggest. She's that drunk nappy headed bitch with the horrible saddle bags under her slanted eyes, rotting teeth on her upper left side of her bloating face most likely due to some prescription steroid usage.

But I digress...

I don't know any other way to say this to you, but don't get so caught up and worried about what it is that has grandpa Negro on neglect mode. The way she's treating you is pretty much what she feels about herself for any number of reasons you just aint found out yet.

I can think of a number of reasons why Grandma is trippin'! Leave the bitch in the convalescent home where you found her and let the nurses take care of her!

2018-03-13 18:56:36

I think I'm just too nice. If I was a thug, spending his money, treating him like shit, playing games, fucking all his homeboys, he would LOVE me. But since I'm pretty much an average Joe, maybe he doesn't feel passionate about me??

I feel like he just might be either scared to get fully involved or wants just physical contact. Meet up, fuck, cuddle/pillow talk in between sessions, hang out for a bit and do it all over again.

But also I don't feel that way, cause he is very sensitive to my needs and seems attentive and like he really wants to make me happy. This whole situation is afucking mess and I Feel like a little bitch.

2018-03-13 19:09:13

Yikes!!! You feel like a WHAT??? Niggah, we REALLY need to talk!

You might be feeling like a little bitch, but you're giving him all of the ammunition to make you feel like that.

How?

For starters, locate your self esteem!

Your looks and accomplishments at your age far exceeds a great many even at HIS age! You keep getting told how attractive you are for one, you truly ARE very attractive!

(2) Two, there's nigghaz telling you that because it often reflects that THEY don't feel nearly as attractive as they find YOU!

(3) Three, they can always sense that you don't feel the highest of regards about yourself and use THAT to manipulate you into a subservient sort of place emotionally and you spending many coins to show them that you care.

This niggah knows what you want and knows that you're serious. He doesn't want it from you because HE either doesn't feel deserving of the love you bring to the table or he may have seen something you've done to make him think or feel that you're not the best candidate for him to get serious about.

I understand the not feeling adequate enough and needing the reassurance of being truly loved for things other than physical and material.

He doesn't know it yet and hasn't learned how to express himself better using honesty.

Stop spending ya cash money to run up seeing his ass! Save all of them coins for a real man with whom you can take a trip outside of the continental US for a weekend and actually share real love!

2018-03-13 19:10:56

You're right. He doesnt want me like that. I See it now.

It happens. I can only imagine what special shit this niggah got to get you caught up on him like that, but I've been there a few times.

When several years have then passed and reflected back on things, I was glad that the shit ended before it even had a chance to take off.

To boot, those were moments out of my life I couldn't get back!

There may be many valid reasons why he can't reciprocate the love you obviously have developed for granny! Granny not ready for you!

Leave granny in the convalescent home so SHE can get mo bettah and learn to walk again!
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